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Author Topic: Whispering Magic [Prototype]  (Read 2693 times)

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Offline Suuper-san

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Re: Whispering Magic [Prototype]
« Reply #15 on: July 20, 2021, 05:43:22 AM »
Volume 1 Bonus Chapter

Volume 1 Bonus Chapter










Bonus - Chapter Title Pages 10-12

Spoiler





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Offline Suuper-san

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Re: Whispering Magic [Prototype]
« Reply #16 on: July 21, 2021, 01:12:14 PM »
Bonus Sketches

Spoiler



























These sketches are for padding the chapters to make sure the pages end up on the right even/odd combination.
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Offline Suuper-san

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Re: Whispering Magic [Prototype]
« Reply #17 on: July 29, 2021, 03:52:47 PM »
Volume 1 Cover



Bonus: Printed Copy

Spoiler



Major statistics dump and rambling to follow, but otherwise this project is now complete!
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Offline legomaestro

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Re: Whispering Magic [Prototype]
« Reply #18 on: July 30, 2021, 04:15:41 AM »
HOLY HECK YOU ACTUALLY PRINTED IT DUDE AND EVERYTHING. (Seeing this in the other threads too.) How did you edit the binding and stuff? That's so cool dude I'd really love to experience this feeling some day hehe. Props!

Btw how much would you theoretically sell one of these volumes? When I'm flush I'd love to order one!



Chapter 4
Mr Soren is indeed strong. Look at that defense spell haha



Chapter 5


Loving these chapter covers across the board with your manga. How did you do the boarders? High quality stuff suuper.
Scary demon voice is scary
Kids can really be bullies. Don't blame them when she doesn't save your butts from a horrible fate!
I wish schools let people who happen not to have grasps on basic concepts let them have 'catch up library sessions' like that. Supervised of course in a sense but a sort of 'in-school homework' where they can freely go tackle something that's bothering them. Or maybe even an on-call tutor? Being dragged along with the best-achievers of the class is an eternal pain that shall always hold people back imo.
Haha Rosterhart is a cool name
Theory: Runes are a stop-gap measure to access mana! Real magic is just done fluidly hehehe (Wait, this might have already been pointed out in earlier chapters but I haven't read in a minute so forgive meh)
Love the backgrounds dude. As always I know where the character is and where they're going. Cool persp shots that don't feel repetitive. Great work with emotions too I can feel her nervousness as she looks for the library.
Pfft broom closet.
Love that library shot!
Oh, I think this is the first old lady I've saeen you draw haha. Like how realistic she looks.
Also I need me a 'beginners' book in my life. All creative endeavours have stagnated so badly I need something to motivate me into my usual flow haha. (Stick figures time mwahahahaha)
Do people have to be good at mechanical drawing to construct magic circules?
HAHAHA THAT TABLE REMINDS ME OF KANJI AND KATANAKA. I can feel the horror and pain but interest too.
Gambate, Serenity-chan



Chapter 6


Great covers as always man. Love her outfit.
I forgot the setting and stew felt like such a weird thing for a moment then I remembered its a magical medieval sort of era? Would be cool to see a modern magic school (Definitely done before but my head is inspired. Or wait - Futuristic magic school haha! Where high tech is actually magic. A sort of twist on Arthur C. Clarkes' statement)
These b *cough* how dare they cast dispel on her!
Oh gawd people not hanging out because of grades. Wait does 'gradeism' exist irl? Wouldn't put it past hoomans haha.
Poor Serenty.
Oh gawd Warren Black is totally a protagonist name. Side Story nowwww
Ruby Swift isn't too bad.
And of course Serenity wants to be a healer. Very peaceful heart-warming expression and panel haha.



Chapter 7


Oh oh... A chapter called 'Difficult Magic' When Serenity is already having trouble doesn't bode well for her haha.
Warrens' teaching me literal life advice with the learning thing *takes note*
Naniiiii How did Shoren get in trouble for such a huge defensive spell
Really great background shots again and I like how the conversations really flow in your panels haha.
I... Don't think her affinity is anything haha. OP SERENITY LEVEL UP AND GOOO
HAHAHA I KNEW IT
Lel Ruby didn't know it was a light spell.
Rai the introvert and Serenity the shy gal. Healing squad goooo



Chapter 8


Totally. Ignored. Daamn Rai.
Did you plan out the map for this world? Curious
Hehe Sam would be a good repair mage in this world. But wait, what  element is repairing magic?
Gawd this foster family is the worst.
Jeez he called her useless. What the hell man.
Oh wait it's not just a circle its separated by dashes. Like Morse code? That's merciless haha.
OH I HATE THESE TWO. How dare you slap herrrr. Warren, teach her a fire-spell. I don't mind there being an accident for them grrr
'Wasting food like that' Gawd I'm pissed.
Hell yesss repair spelllllllll! Goooo Serenity! (Nice work with the paneling as she repaired it. In an anime I could totally hear an inspiring soundtrack going along.)
Determined Serenity GOOOO



Chapter 9


Awesome city shot.
Aaaan of course they're not thankful for the repair job.
Did you use lighter lines/ Opacity this time btw? Somehow cleaner and easier on the eyes? Dunno why. Reminds me of pencil.
Wait she feels remorse? Looks like they're hope for the black heart yet. But what the hell with the slapping and calling her useless dammit!
AND SHES ONLY HAPPY BECAUSE SHE SAVED MONEY. I'll be cautiously optimistic that there's hope for them.
OK even he apologized so I'll take it at face value... For now grrrr. How dare you abuse poor Serenity.
The 'But not so much that you collapse' Convinced me.
Oh gawd this dude with his fireballs can go eat charcoal. He's good at what he does though.
Two faced bastid claiming to help her up. (Also it's amazing how teachers only ever come when there's a hint of retribution to bullies. Unfortunate truth in life too)
Grrrrr people putting other people down just irks me. If you're so elite wouldn't you at the very least not care about someone performing miserably? Why do they need to go up to them? Insecure idjits.
Ohohoho if only they knew who her grandma was.
The absolute silence is beauty to my ears.
I predict they'll either 1- Suck up to her because of her heritage or 2 - Laugh at her for her current struggles. Either way they suuuuck.



Chapter 10


The Seeking witch being surprised by Serenity tells me she's really going to be a legend if she keeps on honing her magic haha.
'I hope i'll have enough time.' Old age? Or something worse?
Aaaand they're laughing at her.
Serenity really is strong.
'Good Results. That's all that matters.' Reminds me of a panel in Black Clover where pretty much the same was said. Funny enough (and hypocritcally enough.) ... I agree. At a certain point there's got to be some result from effort, otherwise something is wrong (Big self-oof that one, but yeah.)
Hahahaha 'Power and guts' showed up again. Joshua is that you?
Literally everyone was giving a negative answer. No one even said go to the library or something haha.
Honestly though The Seeking Witch could've at least written a letter, given her a guardian or told her 'Magic should be freely used without runes.' I feel the hurdles Serenity is going through unless she was orphaned or something aren't worth the struggle. Tis is how villains are made haha.
Damn that's an almost Finding Waldo level of background work hahaha how long did it take? Great pages man. Is it adouble page spread or a single?
Oh nvm lol I scrolled down. Impressive work man!
Don't follow the voice with the black baloooons!
Man how can so many people be douches in this school. At this point even Rais' indifference makes him a saint.
"Warren doesn't have bad friends! That means you're a good person!" Is the sweetest thing ever. Poor Serenity.
Ah- It came through!
Yesss heart-warming ending.



Chapter 11


2 spells in one. Interesting stuff. And I wonder if you can enchant and object with healing properties haha. Healing water, healing medallion e.t.c
Serenity grasped why it's 2 spells in one. Nice.
"It burns without getting burnt!"
And hahahaha he ignored the 'burn' the teacher said by 'Look, even REAVER can make a working enchantment"
But wait, wouldn't that be 3 enchantments that he did? Like making the block fire-resistant too or something?
At this point I really am at the 'Results matter' stage because she's really, really slow at this point haha. Just use magic as you learnt it, Serenity! Repair! Pull water and stuff hehe.
Wait has she cast a spell in class since the beginning?  I can understand if according to her standards she's improved tremendously though.
The teacher is starting to notice Serenity is quite quite special hehehe.
Anna standing up for them? Yessss
YES TELL THEM ANNA.
"I think she's a good person too' hahaha.
Rai wants to talk but... Can't lel hahahaha.  Wonder what he wants haha.


Chapter 12


Oh gawd his head is like a motormouth hahaha.
HOLY HECK BLACK LIGHTNING. Aaaaaaah I should've known with a name like Rai! Holy heck protagonist vibe there too. Warren vs. Rai let's gooooo
Oh gawd that's a conundrum, wanting to be a healer with black lightning. I was totally like the class just now expecting him to be combat based. I'm as guilty as them. But hey, electricity is useful in medicine, just gotta figure out the dosage and situations that arise.
Rai is super studied too hehe awesome.
And he wanted to help Serenity! He's also super kind haha.
Oh gawd he was only buried in his book! Rai you gotta talk more man I totally misjudged you dude!
OH GAWD HIS OVERANALYSIS hahahahahahaha
"That's too difficult!"
*Facepalm* Dude no don't write a letter hahahahahaha.
Lel he wrote the letter a week ago. I just can't with this guy bahahahahahaha
YOU DID IT RAI, PROUD OF YOU.
I really don't think runes are the way for you Serenity.
'The mana... MAY IT FLOW' YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS THIS IS THE MOMENT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR
But nuuu it isn't the magic she wanted indeed.
And holy heck is she literally able to communicate with Mana and stuff. OP, Dangerous and super cooool.

Hehehe Bonus Chapters for the win

She is really lucky to be there pfft
Serenity, this school is made up of not-normal people... You included ! (In a good way hahaha)
'Even though they're nobles, they're not noble.' Honestly, historically how many noble nobles are there? I mean they look noble but none particularly inspire 'Ooh, cool dude.'
Oh nuuuu hair problems hahaha. Learn magic to keep the hair down hahahaha.
A past book worm has found a victim. Wish I had a librarian like that when I was younger. GIMME. BOOKS.
Rai is too precious, and the both of them are too perfect bahahahahaa.
Best friends fight like this. It's fact bahahaha.
SHE GOT LOST IN THE CUPBOARD AGAIN HAHAHAHAHA


Phew holy heck duuuude I just can't even with the amount of output you've done. And this isn't even the last manga. I was super invested in seeing Serenitys' arc continue and the set up for the ring and the angry storm, but I understand it's a prototype.

Props on the backgrounds, the characterisations and the magic system feels quite solid and explored. I love the flow of dialogue in this especially for some reason. Weird comparision but it's like Et Cetera except without the gags where replies feel natural and flow from one to the other.

Many props again, suuper!

Offline Suuper-san

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Re: Whispering Magic [Prototype]
« Reply #19 on: July 30, 2021, 10:36:34 AM »
@Lego thanks so much for the feedback and queries, it keeps me on my toes that I know what's going on as well.
Again to answer your questions I'll reveal a fair amount of spoilers since I wont be writing any more of the story.

Yup gotta have a physical book, that's the ultimate thing once you've done a bunch of work. You've got enough content in your own works to print a couple of books yourself methinks :P

I'll do a tutorial on how to produce a printed book from scratch as I'll be making a few more copies for the fun of it, so I'll explain the binding and all sorts in that.

I would casually put the price at £8-10/$10-13 since that seems to be a general price for a new book. I'd feel bad charging more than that, especially for my current quality of work.
Each story took roughly 120 hours of work, so I'd need to sell around 150-200 copies at RRP to make even for the time spent, at a half decent wage. Which, isn't so unimaginable to be honest, like it sounds like a reasonable target.

Chapter 4:
Some backstory on Judas Shoren - he's actually from the military but realised the potential of raising mages from young (with the intention of use in the military, to defend the country) He suggested the state funded school to get mages from any background, especially poor people who would otherwise go missed. But to his chagrin he was assigned as headmaster of the new academy. His general character was based off Roy Mustang from FMA
I was going to throw a war into the middle of the story but it was only a casual thought as it would quite heavily derail the normal story.

Chapter 5:
Thanks I love the chapter titles too. Adds a nice bit of flair and feels very professional :P
The borders are just a black page with a semicircle and square cut out to make the empty arch, and then swirls drawn one one side and reflected. The title pages here were based off the ones from xxxHolic, I was going for a mystical dark vibe, but generally the theme of the images was just scenic stuff.

Since this is set in general medieval times, the school system is not really properly established yet, and this is really the first school of its kinda that resembles modern education, so it has many flaws in it, that's deliberate, but not clearly explained in the sleightest.

My magic system (unexplained in the story) is as follows:
"Mana" is the remaining energy from the creation of the universe, comprised of the combined souls of the 3 beginning gods (partically explained in the first chapter intro)
Mana has a personality and voice, primarily formed of the remaining whisps of personality from the gods, and mixed with emotions and souls of the dead.
"Runes" are the "language of the gods", but bastardised into a nearly unrecognisable form due to oversimplification from when magic was discovered.
Therefore "magic" is using runes to bind the mana into submission to perform a task ("ordering" as opposed to "asking") This is why Serenity can perform a higher level magic such as repairing the broken bowl without runes (one half of the explanation)

The seeking witch backstory:
The seeking witch discovered the true form of magic to her peril in a magical experiment that went wrong when she was younger, and her soul was detached from her body for a period of time and she became "one with the mana". On finally returning she understood the true nature of magic and the true nature of runes, that of incredibly complex symbols (like flowers, as serenity remembers)
Her personality being absorbed into the mana for so long made her sound crazy when she tried to explain it to others, and they disregarded her rambling as crazy speech, and she eventually went wandering around the world for many years.
But having a now damaged "fractured" soul, the seeking witch is unable to keep her soul properly tethered to her body, and is basically losing her grip on reality. Being powerful and knowledgeable she is eventually able to resist/repair the decay to her soul and finally manages to live a relatively normal life. But unknown to her, her children also inherited a fractured soul and generally had short lifespans (serenity's mother died in childbirth). When serenity copies her magic the seeking witch realises Serenity's potential to use magic without runes, and wants to train her to control it and to also prevent serenity's soul from also decaying over time. But the seeking witch is already near the end of her lifespan, and she doesn't know how long her soul can remain attached to her body.
They are both able to use magic without runes because half of their soul is basically connected to the mana directly and they don't need a written form of magic (runes) to do magic.
Unfortunately the seeking witch did not have enough time and started to die. Determined to help serenity she enchanted part of her soul into her ring, which she had always promised to give to serenity when she was older. The ring helps to connect serenity to the mana in the early part of the story and performs the heavy lifting of the spells, but alas it is just a fragment of the seeking witch's soul and is more chaotic than she had intended.

The backgrounds are probably the best in this book of my 4 stories, I think I had more of a solid idea of what each building or room looked like, so I was able to add more detail.

You are 100% correct I don't think I've every drawn an old lady before (I had one in Omega World in the first chapter tho, but that was a filler character)

Yes, since runes are literal characters you have to understand their form to be able to create the runes when doing magic. Although you dont have to form the runes 100% accurately, the accuracy affects the spells strength.

You are also true, I fitted in a lot of thoughts on Kanji into my descriptions of runes, it helped to explain them when I imagined them as kanji :P

Chapter 6:
Modern magic or futuristic magic is definitely a cool concept, and already somewhere in my massive agenda to try out. Would love to see a techomagic combination. Or as you say, just really really advanced technology.
Gradeism totally exists, and probably in real life just as much, although a person can be bullied for pretty much any imaginable reason.
Glad you like all their names. I didn't add too much thought to them but they turned out cool enough.
Backstory on Warren: he's adopted and wants to help out his adoptive father's alchemy shop.
That was my favourite panel and probably still is, except for the really good city shots.

Chapter 7:
Mr Shoren got in trouble for being "lazy" and not making the defensive spell big enough. Yes he protected 98% of the school but now someone has to repair the gates and Mr Brinks is the one who'll have to organise it all so he's annoyed.
Serenity does have an affinity but it's never an issue for the above mentioned reasons. It's water incidentally.

Chapter 8:
I dont have a too decent map of the world to be honest, it's just distances between places in "days of travel" and not too many places to be honest. Neither do I have a map of the city except in "hours of travel" between locations.
Glad you got mad, I was going for quite an antagonistic vibe with the couple she stays with. I was honestly fuming while I drew it :P
Yup would definitely have an awesome character growth moment music playing in the background

Chapter 9:
You are correct, I accidentally used a dark grey instead of black for the lines. I didn't notice until just now, I must have been in full flow at the time.
Yeah the couple suddenly becoming nice was poorly handled by me, I had wanted it to be more gradual over time, but I wanted something to actually happen in this volume so I pushed it forward just to have more stuff happening.
That was one of my favourite panels with the creepy "let me help you up" pose and face combo. I was pretty proud of that shot.
Partly the elitist part keeps coming up because I want to show the struggle serenity has to face, and I wanted to her to deal with bullying but found it hard to plan each negative interaction with the bullies so I recycled quite a bit of speech between the bullying episodes. And also from a bully's point of view, there's nothing between about putting someone down to make yourself feel higher. Bullies are always insecure, that's spot on even nowadays.
You are correct with both predictions, although I never fitted it in, I did want her to get some attention for being related to the seeking witch and having people approaching her (even in the street as the word gets out)

Chapter 10:
Regarding the "good results", that's said by Anna, who is trying to prove her worth to her father despite the fact he wanted a son to carry on the lineage. That would have come up a lot in the next volume where Serenity and Anna become closer friends.
Yeah I deliberately made everyone give poor advice, although some I tried to phrase as helpful but not really helping. Also I snuck in that the teacher thinks there isnt any magic to clean clothes, despite the fact we have seen it used earlier by the seeing witch.
Yup the "determination and guts" was indeed recycled from the same "energetic idiot" personality trope as the other stories.
The seeking witch disappeared suddenly so she didn't have a chance to write a proper letter or explain the true form of magic to serenity. And the seeking witch has already tried to explain the true form of magic but she was ignored as explained above. The letter of introduction she wrote previously almost as part of a will, as she expected that she wouldn't make it and it was to be opened on her disappearance.

Thanks! Since the art quality is pretty low, the double page city spread only took 40 minutes from start to finish I think. I was really gunning it with the house generation speed. I didn't quite get the feel of scale that I wanted, and struggled on variety of houses and road structure for the most part. It looks pretty cool as a double page spread, but a little hard to see the inset panels though.

Yup the heart warmingness is great. Makes a change from the struggles.

Chapter 11:
Yes, objects can indeed be enchanted with healing magic, although it is quite a difficult spell. A more common form of healing magic is done using alchemy in my story, in which magic is used to increase or alter the performance of chemicals, so making typical medicine work more effectively is easier than trying to enchant healing magic directly.
Serenity is reading the explanation from a book in this case, so she doesn't directly grasp that on her own.
Yes she's developing quite slowly. that's mostly poor writing and planning to be honest, I didn't really have a good sense of how she learns magic (the wrong way), only to find out and start learning magic (the right way). Eventually she discovers the notebooks and journals written by the seeking witch, which have since been archived away because they thought she had gone mad. This helps her to find out the true form of magic.

Chapter 12:
Yup poor Rai gets a lot of trouble himself.
Affinity doesn't have too much of an affect on the type of magic you can learn (like the affinity in HunterxHunter), in most cases any advanced mage can use the same magic as anyone else, by using runes. Thats why the pressure is on to learn to use runes, and why Rai tells serenity she needs to do the same.
Yes he's been misjudged for almost his entire school life now, fortunately he's somewhat intorverted anyway, so he's not upset by it, but really wants to be more friends with everyone.
And yes she directly communicates with mana, as explained above as well.

Thanks, it's been a mad project from start to finish. And the longest project I have ever done as well. In fact it broke all sorts of records and stuff. Looking back if I knew what I know now, I wuld never have started it, but I'm so thankful I did. Learnt an absolute ton, which I'll be rambling about soon.

For some reason this manga went really well for the dialogue and characters, compared to the other 3. Not sure why, perhaps I was just more invested in it since I liked the story more, or some other reason I don't know.

many thanks again :P
« Last Edit: July 30, 2021, 03:51:30 PM by Suuper-san »
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