gah so true. I remember an anecdote about someone can't remember who tho, they were interested in some sort of thing idk an insect or something and kept studying it up, and they read all the books in the library on it etc, and still wanted to know more, and a professor or someone said that there's a world class expert on the field and he could find out who it was. When he saw the name, it was his own XD he'd become world class expert without realizing it and still felt he didn't know enough.
thanks for the advice, I'll definitely keep cracking on with it. Yeah I do tend to have unreasonable goals for myself although I always reason that they're technically possible, but probably need some smaller goals along the way as well.