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Messages - IamKeria

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1
Members Manga / Re: Bokura no Manga
« on: May 13, 2016, 12:25:03 AM »
Hey suupertramp!!!! Check it out! Let me know what you think lol.


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2
Develop Your Story / Re: A Humble's Man Pain
« on: May 10, 2016, 10:13:28 PM »
Thank you for taking the time to read my story. This page has the original story but It change a bit and change the style of it to post to Wattpad. I could have kept it, but I didn't wanna lol. Oh yeah and some of those grammatical errors you suggested, I see you change some things to past tense. I was speaking in present tense. So the add "-ed" wasn't needed. But here is my response. 


Hey! I read both chapters and I added some minor edits here and there leave them or taking them is up to you! It's mostly some grammar things I picked up while reading.

So, let me start off by saying, i'm way more lenient on stories than most people. As in things may not bother me so much when reading something. Some other people might be turned off by certain factors compared to others


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I enjoyed it to an extent of the herbalism shops and him wanted to expand, but sometimes was confused by who exactly was speaking at given times. That could just be a visual thing, since there is no space between lines etc, maybe try a different font size,spacing etc. That and some weird factors in the story.

Okay. I can add spacing bold when people are speaking.


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After reading the first two, I still have questions about the SCI-FI part of it. I saw that there's some form of technology, the water gun,well button, and the robotic things running about. How does this technology play into the Herbalism/Farmer aspect on a grand scale?

This story is meant for you to ask questions such as that. As you can tell from the genre of it there is a pretty weird mixture going on, at least I think it's a weird mixture. Also as you read on you will begin to see exactly how it plays a role in it. The Sci-Fi here is that the technology that they poses is just coming to fruition or I should say coming back to fruition  ;) ;) ;) ;)

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I don't see a point to it just yet in terms of the story. Is it that the neighboring countries have far more advanced technology or something? And that the people in the middle are forced to do basically "hard labor"? Or is it the New generation"Tech" wants to be forced upon the people who want things to remain old fashioned, and acquired said tools etc.


Great! You're asking the right questions. Keep reading and you shall find out. But I will say this, as hinted above there are some old tech that will come into play linking the store full circle. There are different elements of the story that will come into one big understanding.

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Not sure if the 3 diamonds have something to do with it, but it seems it was just put there. Since the Calvary that attacks are just using sword's and bows, and the farmer's have pressurized water guns etc.

It has evvveerrrryyything to do with it. Remember these two words "back story" or is it one word? "backstory". Okay Remember this one word "Backstory" lol. And they aren't diamonds. They are pearls. Oh and like I said before the tech part it's coming to fruition as in it's getting a head start. Butttttt at the same time, it's not. It's old tech that have already been put into play....but you have to keep reading on for that.

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I think you have a lot of genres mixed in it might create inconsistency. Like, Martial arts- Sci-fi, Doesn't really mix with Herbalism and such.

That's what makes the story interesting. It gives you the question in your mind what does Herbs have to do with Martial arts and Sci-fi? Wasn't there an anime or manga with Mechas , Rice and Samurais? Samurai 7?


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Now this being said, is Herbalism going to take a back pedal? From reading it wouldn't seem this would be the case since you do mostly talk about herbs and plants etc. and how they help people who are hurt. In these chapters Herbalism would be the main idea, in which case, is it forgotten later on?

It plays a big role in the story. So no it won't.

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Since Sci-Fi is about more on future tech and such, Herbalism would take a backseat if you think about it. Since, if its so advanced they would have better means to farm herbs etc. Plus if they have some super ship, just speculating of course, how would martial arts play into that.

Well the space ship could always turn into a mech that does super cool martial arts moves a long with gunslinging and samurai wielding mechs. Humanoid cronies that have the specs of ever martial art ever known to man.....wait that sounds like a new story there lol.


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Not sure if you'll get what i'm saying but yeah. I cant commentate on anything more since there was only two chapters, but that's my first initial impression on it. If you want to know if people would read past it, I'm not too sure others will. I think you need to structure it enough to make your ideas of the overall story more apparent to readers.

It starts off slow yes I agree. And there is always this stigma of wanting to grab the readers attention at the first chapter. However, I am not following the status qou on this one. It's like with anime. When It starts out not interesting but then it gets real real real interesting (not saying that my story would to some readers but I hope it would). And those who dropped at the first episode miss out on an awesome anime. Like Class room crisis (I just finished it the other day. I recommend it if you haven't watched yet).


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Of course, you can ignore everything I said and feel what is best for you, I'm not perfect in any means.

You have good points but then again I like my ideas as well. I take heed to the criticism but would like to see how this go. I am planning to put the story on Wattpad once I create an "okay" book cover until i get better enough to create an Awesome one lol. Also I am going to change up this page a bit so you can come directly here to read the story. Just put it on watch for updates on the third and fourt revision of the story.



3
Manga Writer workshop / Re: Review Swaps
« on: May 10, 2016, 08:27:59 PM »
I'd also be interested in review swapping.

Hey AzimuthComics just leave a link to what you want reviewed and tell us how you want it to be reviewed. Use this here as a guide to posting. Request for Review Posting Example , Scroll down to the 13th and 14th Post.

In which I also have to repost and follow this example lol.

4
Manga Writer workshop / Re: Review Swaps
« on: May 10, 2016, 08:17:30 PM »
Hey! I read both chapters and I added some minor edits here and there leave them or taking them is up to you! It's mostly some grammar things I picked up while reading.

Hey Flames117. Since we can't put the critics here I have two options you can put it here Dance of Enb/A Humbles Man Pain Or You can put it at the end of the chapter on Google docs in a comment. I will be answering your critic there on the title page. Thank you for reading.

5
Manga Writer workshop / Re: Review Swaps
« on: May 10, 2016, 12:25:27 PM »
Hmm, not sure If I should post my own, its not in a manga format and is quite lengthy so I'll only put chapter 1, Completed story is around 160. But nonetheless, read it or not choice is yours . I'm still down for reading other peoples stuff though. I'd say its more like Sakurasou no Pet na Kanojo, at least that's what I want. To have a serious tone to it but being light in some spots and dark in others, dark being more of the theme as the story progresses, and more conflict and fights happen, some being extreme. 

I am willing to read it. I'll have a review for it maybe tonight or sometime tomorrow. Here is the link to my story. I post Weekly chapters on it. Dance of Enb

I would like tough criticism as well as soft. I would like to know how is my delivery, Is the story interesting for the first two chapters, does it keep you wanting to know what happens next? Or what do they mean about this or that?

If you're willing to accept brutal honesty, why ask for soft critique?

Because there are some people who don't know how to be brutally honest.....

6
Manga Writer workshop / Re: Review Swaps
« on: May 09, 2016, 11:21:26 PM »
Hmm, not sure If I should post my own, its not in a manga format and is quite lengthy so I'll only put chapter 1, Completed story is around 160. But nonetheless, read it or not choice is yours . I'm still down for reading other peoples stuff though. I'd say its more like Sakurasou no Pet na Kanojo, at least that's what I want. To have a serious tone to it but being light in some spots and dark in others, dark being more of the theme as the story progresses, and more conflict and fights happen, some being extreme. 

I am willing to read it. I'll have a review for it maybe tonight or sometime tomorrow. Here is the link to my story. I post Weekly chapters on it. Dance of Enb

I would like tough criticism as well as soft. I would like to know how is my delivery, Is the story interesting for the first two chapters, does it keep you wanting to know what happens next? Or what do they mean about this or that?

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Manga Writer workshop / Re: Review Swaps
« on: May 09, 2016, 05:50:01 PM »
Well let's Revive it then :D . Post the link to your story and we can follow the same format as before.

8
Comics and other Gallery / Re: Keri's Colourist Progress
« on: May 09, 2016, 12:07:57 PM »
nice coloring. i cant comment much since i have only just started myself, but it looks fairly good.
perhaps when shading hair, try and make the shade have jagged lines to match the direction of the hair.

Thanks. I use Sketchbook Pro 7. I like to use the airbrush a lot which makes it look all blotchy. I was told to take the lasso tool or paint brush and just blend the colors in that area and use the opacity to make it blend more.

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Manga Writer workshop / Re: Review Swaps
« on: May 05, 2016, 09:39:49 AM »
Anyone interested in revamping this!? If so post below so I can get an idea of how much interest there is. Thanks!


Sure? Lol

10
Members Manga / Re: Bokura no Manga
« on: April 28, 2016, 05:02:19 PM »
Wow you ink this traditionally? Way to go lol. I  have shaky hands so I will bomb x10 trying to do it traditionally. Also, I would like to ask would you allow me to color one page of your manga. I am an upcoming colorist and I need the practice. If you are interested let me know. Keep up the good work.

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Huh cool stuff...well ya go ahead if you want to but I think you'll find it a bit problematic since the pages are rough and uninked with lots of guidelines still in place. However if you want to colour something go ahead, as long as you give us credit for the original it's all good. You'll have to ask Lego about colour pallets though, I don't know what colours he imagined the characters in...

Great! I will personal message you guys.

12
Collaboration (Art Exchange) / Re: Colorist Practice
« on: April 26, 2016, 08:54:14 PM »
Well I know you said something in my Larry Pine thread but if you'd like I can offer something that's actually inked which will make it easier and look better in the end! I have just one question though, how do you feel about backgrounds? Do you want something light on them or does it matter?

Hey thanks for responding. When I think of backgrounds, I think of challenging. So therefore I wouldn't mind the challenge. Go for it with the backgrounds. I just recently flatted a comic sample page with a good amount of background hoopla going on lol. So it doesn't matter.

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Collaboration (Art Exchange) / Colorist Practice
« on: April 26, 2016, 07:34:12 PM »
Hey all. I am an upcoming colorist. If anyone would like for me to color any of their work feel free to reach out to me. I am not perfect but I need the practice. So if anyone would like to collab with me that will be great. Here are samples of what I have colored so far. Or you can Click Here and check out some more of my coloring :3.

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Members Manga / Re: Running From Dragons
« on: April 26, 2016, 07:17:16 PM »
Hey there. I really like the colors. I am a practicing colorist and I have to say your blending is very nice. What program was used for this? Manga Studio?

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Lol this is awesome. He's falling alright. I would love to collaborate with either flatting or coloring a page of your manga. I am still a practicing colorist but if you want to check out some of what I have colored as far as random line art click this link Keria the Upcoming Colorist :D . Keep up the awesome work. Ready to read more.

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