May 07, 2021, 02:54:24 AM

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Messages - Suuper-san

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1
General Manga writer discussions / Re: Writer Discussion Table
« on: May 04, 2021, 10:47:14 AM »
both ways are valid, but since the entire fall is essentially backstory to your actual story, it boils down to how long you want your intro to be.

One of my current stories has so much backstory I struggled finding a good palce to start from since I filled out the past more than my actual story plot.

A decent idea that I'm trying to do is put in the backstory bit by bit as flashbacks and so on.

I like NO1SEY's idea of ending the prologue on a high and then cutting striaght into the low in the next chapter. Just maknig the difference clear and that there was a fall from grace and you can fill in the missing story as you go.

2
Develop Your Story / Re: Suuper's Writing Projects & Manga Stories
« on: May 02, 2021, 04:39:08 PM »
Chapter 4 is realised of each story. Just about made it in time this week, hopefully pick up and it'll be less tight next week.

Eclipse

Beta Reincarnation

Whispering Magic

Et Cetera



This is my project status as of now:
Spoiler

So far it's my worst week, but not only did I have less time available this week but other stuff came up unexpectedly and I lost time on the last day, today, to catch up with stories that were behind. That'll teach me to get the work done earlier in the week and not have to worry about what may or may not happen in the future.

Fortunately I have a bonus day tomorrow as I don't have work on a bank holiday, so I'll be spamming the hours to get the projects back to a stable level.

I’m not sure if it’s bad planning but I’m coming up with new scenes after deciding the content of a chapter, and so the chapter expands beyond what can fit and it spills over into a new chapter. So I’m never getting the cliff-hangers I want and then I’m joining the next chapter to the middle of the next chapter and it’s confusing a lot of the time. It’s also extending my plot by quite a bit when one line of idea i.e. “John explains magic to Bob” becomes like 10 pages of manga, so it’s quite arbitrary and I don’t know what I’m doing. In some ways this isn’t a bad thing because I don’t have to worry about what I will write the next week, because I’ve already planned it out this week.

This project is consuming a lot more time than planned, or rather, I’m not being very efficient and so I’m using up all my available time in the week, with nothing to spare for other regimes etc. I really had hoped to have a manga page study/copying going on to get the grasp of new stuff, which would feed back into the projects, but I hope as I get the full hang of this output that I’ll get the time freeing up more. On average this is taking about 40 hours a week, 10 per manga. That’s almost bang on my prediction actually. The trouble is I’m sitting down to do an hours work, and I only get half an hours work done, through fluffing around, not focusing etc. So I’m trying to get my focus fully on track. That’s the issue with long term stamina I guess, the first week I was doing a lot better than I am now. But awareness is helping to keep it in check.

It seems like I’m hopelessly behind as always so my short term goal is just to get further ahead each week, to be in a better point for the next week. I hope within 4 weeks I’ll be 100% on track and not using extra days to catch up.

Something that is already working well is learning what sort of things I don’t like drawing repeatedly, as well as noticing places where I’m not being creative enough with poses. So far I’ve repeated quite a lot of poses where I get stuck for body language, so there’s plenty of room to loosen up even in this sketchy style. It’s creating a lot of artistic regrets, and so I’m hoping when I get to study professional manga pages next, I’ll be able to notice “Oh that’s how I could have done it!” a lot more.

Even with a massively sketchy style it’s good for trialling out poses, shots, expressions, effects and so on, with minimal time investment. This is giving me a lot of experience at a fraction of the time cost. Definitely one of the things I was expecting, although not actually a priority.

Also what’s useful is that I think this is raising my lowest possible quality level. Like I’m drawing on days where I’m seriously tired or don’t care at all, and it’s still coming out...alright, all things considered.

Also I’m feeling that each story is gaining more issues day by day, very quickly. I’m not sure what sort of problem this is, a writing issue, a focus issue, I’m getting too serious about it when it’s just meant to be a loose project, or whatever. I think in some aspects I’ve still set the quality too high, or I’m trying to quality match previous sections when that just won’t be possible some times for time constraints or difficulty etc. Possibly I’m getting scared about failure as well as I build up success each week, the failure will be larger when I can’t do the weekly amount that I want. So whatever the issue is, I’ve got to face it and overcome it. I know I’m definitely getting too serious about it at times, and so I’m trying to just burn through the work without worrying about the lack of quality, because I need the experience of doing anything.

A very annoying paradox about this project is that the only way to keep completing chapters is to avoid too high an emotional investment in it, but that in turn makes it hard to have any sort of quality control or to think seriously about plot development, otherwise I start taking myself too seriously and I can’t move forward. So really I’m rubbishing these stories more than I would have liked. Otherwise I’ll be too scared to try out events that I’ve never done before, like someone dying, betrayal, falling in love etc. So I’m sort of working at an even lower level than my current writing ability. Given the amount of time I’m investing in the project it feels very strange, but it’s the way to get the best improvement long term I’m convinced. Trying to blaze ahead carefree is very not my style as a planner/micromanager but I’m slowly getting used to it. It’s very hard to get my head around, but basically there are a lot of skills gained from just writing anything, and so I’m leaning into experimental writing occasionally, like “shall I make the characters unexpectedly nasty”, or “let’s make this character look really cool”, with not much reason behind it. Something that I had in mind from the beginning of this project was to basically trial out a lot of clichés. Not deliberately, but whatever ones came up, to just go with them and see how they went. That way I’ll gain my own experience for what works and what doesn’t. So if you notice something incredibly cliché, there’s a chance I put it in to just get it off my chest, and I just wanted to see how it looked. This is making each story become more disjointed than I would like, but it’s giving me more chances to try out all sorts of things. Definitely these are becoming “prototypes” in more ways than one. It’s basically a really time-expensive “thinking out loud”.

In a similar way I’m not really focusing on any particular writing skill at the moment while I just get used to creating the volume of content that’s required each week. That’s enough for now, and I’ll start challenging new skills as soon as possible. I’m just focusing on writing any sort of story for now, writing a good story will have to wait a while.

I had to really rush stuff to finish on time this week, and the pressure definitely gave me a speed boost for not only each stage, but getting down to focus faster because of having so much to do, in so little time.

3
Members Manga / Re: Et Cetera [Prototype]
« on: May 02, 2021, 04:33:36 PM »
Chapter 4: Distractions

Chapter 4: Distractions


































Thoughts:

Not sure how I managed to make a Jenga game last the entire chapter but there you go. Not sure if this is the direction I want to take it. Also not really sure what to do with the robot. I do have lots of ideas but they go in all sorts of directions so it’s a pain knowing which way to go, and also making sure that I don’t try something that’s way too hard for me at the moment.

I had to really dish these pages out to finish them on time today, as I was extra behind from other life commitments, so they look a tad extra sketchy than normal. But to be honest I'm not entirely displeased all things considered. I really wanted to not fail in my weekly posting within the first 4 weeks, so I'm my first checkpoint clear now.

anyways, enjoy.

4
Members Manga / Re: Whispering Magic [Prototype]
« on: May 02, 2021, 04:30:46 PM »
Chapter 4: The Storm

Chapter 4: The Storm
































Thoughts:
The first 2 panels I think are in the wrong order because they are meant to carry on without a break from the previous chapter last page, so the 2nd panel would have been better first as a recap panel I think.

This is only one day at school but it’s already stretching quite a few chapters ahead. I know pacing of manga varies by what’s happening but it feels very slow at the moment to gain speed and get into the actual plot. Like If I were reading this I’d probably be getting bored or suspicious by now that it’s not going anywhere. Maybe it just feels like that because I’m thinking about how the story goes next, but I’m not there yet.

I think Warren is the best character introduction I’ve done so far, although I think I could have swapped the two panels when he first appears, to give his first appearance more impact, and then Serenity’s reply can be in the second panel with the both of them.

Deciding the content of magic lessons varies a lot between exposition of my magic system and pure flavour text for filler. Obviously the more filled out my magic system is the easier I’ll be able to make it sound real, but at the moment I’m sort of winging it with a general idea in my head. Interestingly this has led me down the path of “when creating a magic system, how is it taught/learnt in the story?” as a bonus element to complexity.

anyways, enjoy.

5
Members Manga / Re: Beta Reincarnation [Prototype]
« on: May 02, 2021, 04:29:00 PM »
Chapter 4: On a Quest

Chapter 4: On a Quest
































Thoughts:

I really wanted to add shading for the night time, but decided not to because of time constraints and not being sure exactly how to do it. I’ll pay attention to other manga when there is a night scene to get a better idea and then I’ll be prepped for the next one. There’s a lot of first time stuff going on like this and it’s just making me aware of the things I have to keep an eye out in real life or in manga to learn from.

anyways, enjoy.

6
Members Manga / Re: Eclipse [Prototype]
« on: May 02, 2021, 04:26:12 PM »
Chapter 4:Brother and Sister

Chapter 4:Brother and Sister
































Thoughts:

Once again a main character is casually introduced...and I’ll do it again so help me.
Not much really happens in this chapter, not sure why but that’s how it spaced out. I had to chop the ending off as I ran out of pages again and so the chapter ends not where I would have liked.

Getting quite stuck on personalities and staying in character for each person’s dialogue. I think I’m messing up pretty badly on certain character’s reactions, which in turn affects the flow of the plot. There are a lot of places where if you asked me to justify it I just wouldn’t have a clue. Problems everywhere but I trudge on.

anyways, enjoy

7
Members Manga / Re: Eternal Night
« on: May 02, 2021, 07:12:42 AM »
definitely the tools we use can help in in our path, I use digital now instead of traditional for the most of my art as well, it definitely makes it faster to work. that and just gaining experience which really helps to make things easier as you move on.

Your consistency for quality has been pretty good on the most part I think.

yeah 30-50 pages is quite large. Chapter length doesnt matter too much as long as you're not producing to a set timescale, some manga have only 3 chapters in a 200 page book so really just getting your story down is the most important thing.

I make typos myself as well, a good way to avoid that is to type your script first in a program that has a spell checking feature, and then copy the correct text and paste it in your comic.

good job and keep it up!

8
Manga Art Gallery / Re: Echo Archives
« on: May 02, 2021, 06:36:22 AM »
the RPG was brilliant!

took me about 15 minutes to clear because I couldn't find some items for a while, but it was a really good short game, with an awesomely cute ending. would definitely want to play another like it!!
very inspiring for me to try and just make a small game in a quick project.

I can't sing at all so I wont judge you ehehehe

and drawing any male character is a bit of a difficulty for me :P

fantasy/historical hairstyles are totally very interesting and inspiring, I need to increase my default hairstyle range :P

9
Manga Art Gallery / Re: Seven Manhwa
« on: May 02, 2021, 06:29:51 AM »
nice cover!

only critique is that the title font is really had to read, I read it as "Scorn" first of all.

I'm a super slow paced writer as well, although I think I'm picking up pacing lately. Not sure if I like it or not :P

10
break Room / Re: The Status Of Our Fellow Raiders
« on: May 02, 2021, 06:27:52 AM »
@MK enjoy!!

11
Comics and other Gallery / Re: Miscellaneous Arts and Sketchbook
« on: May 02, 2021, 06:27:13 AM »
epic stuff, some really cool poses in there.
and you're totally dishing it out these days!!

I think the 1000 figure drawing regime was the game changer for me in terms of bulk work and quality control. Figures are super useful in manga so it's always going to be beneficial work.

12
General Manga writer discussions / Re: Writing Log
« on: May 02, 2021, 06:25:25 AM »
Quote
get away from the pressure of writing the main story by just writing random things happening to the character that you wouldn't usually see
I actually have this as a pending method of developing both characters and story, by working through different circumstances you expand the world and characters in it.

I'm writing roughly 500-1000 words a day average on my weekly manga scripts now, not really getting the hang of improving my first drafts yet so I'm just dishing out fresh stuff until I figure out quality control.

13
Manga Writer workshop / Re: WRITING SURVIVAL!!!
« on: May 01, 2021, 11:54:00 AM »
overall a solid set of stories you've done lately, I'm honestly amazed at the similar tone yet completely different stories you've come up with. Are you using any prompts for this or just writing what comes naturally?

I really must pick your brain for skills because I would be tickled pink to come up with anything as good as these, even though they are just quickly thrown together, they would all make fantastic one-shot manga for the most part, and most could easily spawn a series.

Good stuff and well done for the work, looking forward to your other projects taking flight :P

also, you skipped back a day (you have 2 #15's), the last one is #17. congrats on doing an extra story than what you thought!

As promised, the reviews.


RE: Day 6, Silverback Dawes

You like naming vehicles, don't you :P
And weapons :P

A curious beginning since you give away the major intents of the character first and then explain the setting.

Quite a fun read actually I found myself liking the main character quite a bit.

No character interaction in this one although plenty with the hovercar and gun which was both bizzare and amusing.

I was imagining a nuke would be too heavy to punt like a football? I imagined it about the size of a large backpack at the minimum. Did the shields help in some way to strengthen his kick? I guess that's what you were implying.

RE: Day 7, The Heroes Last Battle

it would have been nice if the fight had more choreography, the parts you explained in detail were well described, but others were more generic "they fought some more"

I felt that given both characters were sort of main characters it was an interesting read.

super sad ending but nicely done, could feel the emotion.

RE: Day 8, The Whale Conductor

chuckled at the rocket to the moon comparison.

such a bizzare concept I can't really give much of an opinion tbh.

the use of magic was well described

RE:Day 9, Robert Montgomerys’ Last Portrait

I've noticed in quite a few of your stories you do have people who are good or trying to become good at art, possibly a leaking over of your own ambition into the story, or as they say "writing about what you know".

I found myself relating with some aspects and being very jealous of others.

the war interlude was a very strange middle for sure

The way the king spoke didn't sound very regal for some reason, I'm not sure why, perhaps the ",right?" interjection at the end of the sentence, or there just weren't many formal sounding words. I think the King being awed should have been mentioned before he spoke as otherwise you don't know who is speaking, and it's not like the King sneaked up on him unannounced.

RE: Day 10, Float

would you say the dog was playing soccer? playing with the ball, yes, but it sounds like the dog's playing a full-on game there :P

nice interaction with Mark, the dialogue felt very real and believable.

You end a lot of stories with "it was peaceful" or similar.

RE: Day 11, Harold Watches Dragons

you made me google "exobiology" lol. Turns out it's the old name for "Astrobiology". Who knew.

a nice read, mixture of nature observation and architectural descriptions.

Would very much like to see some illustrations of this, would make for a very beautiful one-shot manga.

RE: Day 12, Gar 440

a very interesting take on a reincarnation story, I can't say I've seen one like it.

this could definitely fuel some action filled stories with massive power battles for sure.

laughed at "not-tessa"

hard to describe this one but the writing felt quite passive, that things were happening to the main character but it didn't feel like he was connected to the event properly. I can't explain it. maybe he smiled a few too many times as a recaction.

RE:Day 13, A Misadventure

you use "damned" as an adjective quite a bit in your writing. not that I disagree, but maybe try for other interesting words, especially when it comes to darkness there's always a lot of cool ways to describe it.

the place he was in was described well, and I properly felt the pain in his leg and felt the tension "is he gonna make it?"

nice ending.

RE:Day 14, Samuel and the Queen

good intro paragraph, set both the scene and the characters backstory and emotions in very few words.

this story was actually really well written, the emotion, the characters, everything, definitely one of your better stories on the survival thread.

I wish I could say more but I just can't describe why it felt so much better. Just each line seemed to fit to the next one, nothing felt off.

only annoyances was the description of the summoning brand sounded a bit confusing, is that a typo when you said the "familiar only disappeared"?

also later on when Mixy spoke, rather than just "Mixy said", perhaps say Mixy spoke in his head or something.

RE: Day 15, Patricia Summons a Demon Lord

interesting read, could see this developing into almost a romcom possibly.

I felt the main character or setting wasn't introduced too well as the mention of the necromancy book had me like "oh is this a normal magic story". The story title implies the story is, but then the first few paragraphs aren't in the slightest mentioning magic or fantasy elements and so I figured that perhaps this is a "no-one knows about magic and the main character stumbles on it" story. but then it wasn't. perhaps the order of introducing things could have been different.

the first sentence of the story was interesting but I didn't get how it related to anything in the story.

also, mysterious Starbucks employee is mysterious :P

RE: Day 15, Michael Scores

very interesting first line by coach. I'm quite keen on writing motivation and possibly cryptic one-liners so I liked this one.

"everything went wrong for a beautifully long 45 minutes", I liked this.

I'm sure you've ended quite a few stories with "and that was that". It's a nice phrase but possibly a bit weak. perhaps refer back to the first sentence and end with "and with that, he was a winner", or something. I dunno :P

RE Day 16, Antlantis is Falling

well this started depressingly.

an excellently selfless main character, actually most of your main characters are pretty decent folk. I suppose that's how it goes.

and this also has a "main character dies but ends up being saved" plot twist. Not that I dislike them mind you ehehehe

although that does raise a few questions about how he was actually saved...he basically drowned, so you're normally brain-dead in a couple minutes after death. so given the chaos at the current moment I can't imagine his body was recovered that fast by his comrades and then stuck on ice or something for 5 years. Like did the procedure take 5 years? I think there's a limit to how much you can handwave with "it's an experimental procedure", perhaps add a "the radiation preserved your body until we could recover it". just needs a bit more explaining that's all.

Also you call it a body of metal/metal body twice, possibly swap one phrase with "cybernetic parts" or similar.

14
Manga Writer workshop / Re: WRITING SURVIVAL!!!
« on: April 28, 2021, 01:01:01 AM »
Oh manga is totally all about writing, but in terms of time spent it's about 75% drawing, even with my sketchy style. So what I meant was that I'm not spending as much time levelling up writing because I'm drawing for so much.
If I didn't draw I could do 4 times as much writing...easily 5k a day I think.

yeah looking back is typically the best way of gauging your progress, although time spent/projects completed can be a decent gauge of theoretical progress, although it may take time for that to show consistently.

15
Manga Writer workshop / Re: WRITING SURVIVAL!!!
« on: April 27, 2021, 11:15:01 AM »
Quote
I'll get back to you in detail on the answer and some other stuff, stay tuned hahaha
I shall look forward to that.

I think partly the issue is that I've done so little writing I dont even understand the aspects of skill that I dont have yet. I can't even see the tech-tree yet. I have very little skills in quality assessment :/

Something else I noticed is that while my manga projects do indeed give me writing experience, it's not the right kind, or it's not enough, or what I don't know. I think I ought to do something with no art attached that I can dish out more chapters quickly and gain more experience.
The manga projects are primarily to gain weekly-manga related skills, and while writing is in there somewhere, it's not prominent enough compared to the art.

I'm also not sure what timescale to expect to get better at writing, it's not going to be instant I know, but I'd like to put my foot to the floor if I can. Probably writing a novel would have been a better idea I wonder. maybe change things up with my manga project and have a hiatus where I write a novel in draft style over a month (NaNoWriMo style), and then back to manga for 2 months or something. just thinking out loud here.

I'll see what I can come up with for sketch survival, possibly sort of copying your style and format for a short piece of a larger story, like a first chapter of sorts. I could definitely use loosening up and free-writing a lot more.

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