Author Topic: Et Cetera [Prototype] (Read 3335 times)

Suuper-san · « **Reply #15 on:** July 03, 2021, 10:18:14 AM »

wow, Lego, you're really an all or nothing kinda guy aren't you XD
absolutely love your feedback and thoughts as always.
feel free to give whatever kind of feedback on the others, whatever works for you. Although I would prefer a little criticism where possible to point out "you could've phrased/reordered/angled this better" kinda stuff. but glad to know what you found funny, especially as it's a comedy manga.

Chapter 3:
yup right to left, always, for me. (so much for the warning on the first page of every chapter!)

for tables and chairs proportions, the table surface is often at the characters elbow position, so I draw the table and then the person's elbows, and then the shoulders, and then finally the head. an iteration to redraw the guidelines will fix any weird issues. a very good hack in my opinion.

I was hoping to go more gung-ho with Lewis's chunibyou but found myself short of ideas and expressions, mostly.

Chapter 4:
Thanks! I love the title pages too, they're the easiest to draw out of my 4 stories.

I'm not sure if it was good that I made an entire episode out of it or not, like it felt like I dragged it out too much. Not sure if I could have got away with more panels per page and therefore fitted the story in less pages, to add more content to the chapter, or not.

Chapter 5:
The card breaking is actually a true story, happened almost exactly as I wrote it in the manga. Funny how life gives you inspiration. Gotta live more to write better stories methinks. and yes it requires a heck of a lot of force, but once the card starts to go, it goes :P

I tried to go very exaggerated with the interactions but found myself quite limited by still trying to stick to proportions and so on rather than totally winging it for epic exaggeration. Gotta learn more.

you think it is a lot of content? I'm somehow feeling that it's dragging out to fill a chapter, as I have said on and off over the weeks.

Chapter 6:
Ahaha not a clue on the teacher being a ninja or devil fruit user, is it just in the children's minds how they percieve adults, or is there something more crazy going on? who knows :P
I was just going for crazy without a thought for the consequences, hoping to fall out of my comfort zone if I shake myself hard enough :P

I always wanted the children to get away with minimal punishment for the problems they cause, so that's why the teachers do nothing. It's a sort of parody sitcom I guess, so normality doesn't get much say in what goes on.

Chapter 7:
what happened to the game club indeed. I actually had a different timeline where the game club characters get introduced, but I cut it to fit into one chapter, so this is really an alternate ending to what "acutally" happened.

The "help" was a red herring and is a card from a game, but since the ending changed that was never revealed.

sorry for the lack of conclusion ehehehe gotta get better at that /(-_-)\

Chapter 8:
yup drawing the backgrounds is always a pain when you dont have too concrete an idea of where exactly they are. Ideally having some sort of map to show the relative locations of stuff would allow for more BG variety. basically more time spent designing the environment and setting.

ahaha she borrowed the card off her dad. Does he even know she borrowed it? ahaha :P

Chapter 9:
I had hoped to have more of this situation where Cogno gets confused by things and causes trouble, but it's very case-by-case and I sturggled to come up with good enough ideas. Ideally this chapter and the previous one is more how I wanted the entire manga to be, lots of different situations and places, kinda stuff.

Chapter 10:
yup Rosie is "the cute one (TM)"

the clothes bags disappeared, because object permanence can go to hell XD

I considered adding the bowtie speech (I half wrote it), but had to cut it for chapter space. it also wasn't incredibly funny and so didn't add much to the story for the space it consumed.

thanks each toy robot is loosely based off stuff I could remember (gundam/r2d2 etc)

glad you find it funny :)
after several iterations it all sounds the same to me and I have to trust my initial self that wrote the jokes while laughing to himself.

Chapter 11:
she might be poor but she's happy and loved, which is far better.

krystal is indeed filthy rich ahaha but I scrapped that chapter in favour of a more chaotic/funny one, so that's a story that probably wont see the light of day.

again, many thanks for the feedback.

Suuper-san · « **Reply #16 on:** July 14, 2021, 02:32:17 PM »

Chapter 12 - Risky Games

Thoughts:

This one had a bit more chaos and comedy like I had originally planned, so that was nice, but execution was horrible as always. Thinking back it would have been better to have Cogno transform into something useful instead of the bowtie but I was out of ideas at this point and my brain was empty.

I super struggled to write this chapter but it might have just been my mood at the time since I was kinda grumpy that day. Took part of 2 days to write it, but overall the same amount of actual “working time”, just a lot of moping around and not writing anything followed by a flurry of typing and writing half a script.

The art quality was super horrible for this chapter as I hadn’t properly drawn in like 2 weeks and lost all sense of quality control and target quality, but art quality was never a target of this project at all, so I’m kinda meh about that. Starting to wonder if a more guideline style would be better for drafting than what I’m doing. It would certainly save time, and would probably be just as helpful, without wasting time on a scrappy ink style. We’ll see.

enjoy.