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Author Topic: Eternal Night  (Read 1921 times)

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Offline stardustpink

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Eternal Night
« on: November 16, 2020, 08:13:18 AM »

















Offline stardustpink

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Re: Eternal Night
« Reply #1 on: February 02, 2021, 08:00:56 AM »









Offline Suuper-san

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Re: Eternal Night
« Reply #2 on: February 13, 2021, 05:21:09 AM »
So sorry I didn't notice this when you first posted it!

Your art style is very simple, which works well for the characters, but not so much for the backgrounds. It would be good to see some more details in the backgrounds to give a bit more stability to the shot. not necessarily all the time, but on some pages there is no BG despite maybe 6 or so panels.

The story itself is very nice so far, with lots of different personalities, emotions and exchanges between characters.

I think individual panels would be quite small if this was printed out in manga size, so I think you could have some more close-up shots. A lot of the shots results in the characters being a very similar size.

Your panel format is very shoujo style, which can be confusing sometimes to know the panel order, but overall I don't think it affected the story much.

Good use of background effects and patterns to set the mood.

A couple of typos here and there, such as "dident", "your" instead of "you're", etc. I recommend typing your script into a word processing program to use the spell check, and then copy across into your art program.

overall lovely work so far and would love to read more!
Art: Manga / Fanart / Requests (closed) / Other | Manga Stories: Overdrive / Dark Strike
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