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Author Topic: What if you died today?  (Read 1337 times)

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Offline MoonFlame

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What if you died today?
« on: February 12, 2020, 06:09:03 AM »
So, as some of you guys may already know, qinniart has died, it feels strange because, she was an artist that i really liked, and i even followed her on Instagram and such... The thing is, its soo weird because i am not a person to feel sad about someones dead and i am really "whatever" to these kinds of things, but since she was someone i respected and her artwork was something i really appreciated, i just got this weird feeling...

So i started thinking about things, and came up with something.

What if was you? If you died today, would you feel proud of the person you where? Would you feel good about the things you did to other persons? Would you be satisfied knowing that you had lived your life to the fullest and given the best you could into the things you liked with effort and dedication? Would you be satisfied with the things you conquered? Are you really trying to conquer something or are you just slacking off? Will someone remember you after you died? And if someone remembers you, then for what you would be remembered?

The thing is that life is so fast, but we always act like we have all the time in the world, we always say "tomorrow i will start eating less", "tomorrow i will really take more effort into studying", "when i got the time, i will put some effort into learning a new thing". But we never know if there will really be a tomorrow, and if dont, then we will feel proud about the way we have taken our lifes until now?

I usually just do things because i have to, i never put effort into anything and limit myself to only do the things i know the best, because these are the things i will take less effort. I only draw because i learned how to do it when i was a teenager, i decided to work with programming because i have a good skill with it, but i never did anything more than what i was asked to do until now.

Qinniart was such an inspiration for me, and is so sad to feel that i will never be able to see her new artworks again.

And when i stopped to think about it, i ask myself "would someone feel like that if the same happened to me?", "Would i feel satisfied, with the way i took my life until now?"

It seems like Qinniart died doing what she loved the most, drawing, and is even said in her instagram that she was drawing while she should be resting, until her last breath, she was still giving all she had to art.

And now, i just think, i dont wanna slack off anymore, i want to be remembered, i want to put effort in even the little things, i want to feel like, even if the sky falls tomorrow i will be happy, because i will know that i had given everything i got to the things i loved.

So guys, this is just something that i wanted to share with you, i never thought someone i never meet would mess with me in that way, i hope that if there is some kind of after life, she is in a happy place, satisfied about what she conquered until today.

Sorry for my bad english.

« Last Edit: February 12, 2020, 06:11:25 AM by MoonFlame »
looks like that's it, got to go...

Offline legomaestro

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Re: What if you died today?
« Reply #1 on: February 12, 2020, 06:35:43 AM »
I didn't know her at all but it hit me too. I caught on pretty quick that she's been a legendary figure that's been fighting a long amount of sickness, and her art is just beautiful. A true loss, but also a life lived the fullest.

Between this and Kobe I'm thinking a lot about how you can't shield yourself from croaking one day. It's probably not healthy to dwell on it all the time, but yes one day will be the last.

I am utterly unsatisfied with who I am, but if a blood vessel pops in my brain this moment I sure as hell know I've drawn and written for dayyyss (well, in comparision to myself, at least) .  There will be piles of drawings to sort through.

I'd like to say my projects were finished but I've had a good run, and I'm going to be consistently plugging away at words and drawings as I wish.

I can definitely do better though.

Also as far as work is concerned I heard a quote. "When you're old and in retirement you're never going to say 'I wish I worked longer office hours' " as a regret. Be successful. Sure as hell be successful, but try to look into things that are really important.

Offline Suuper-san

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Re: What if you died today?
« Reply #2 on: February 12, 2020, 06:58:19 AM »
I didn't know her before but I heard of her death a day or so ago through browsing.
I do think this often to be honest. I have actually told my parents to post on here to let you guys know if anything happened to me. I'd hate it if you were all left wondering.
Partly getting older I have had this realization often, what am I doing with my life. That's why I try and avoid endless browsing and try and pursue my skills, as well as make time for family and friends.

I only work part-time, because I don't need loads of money for the stress and loss of time and energy that work causes. And money certainly doesn't buy happiness, in fact quite often the opposite.

We will always have things we don't like about ourselves, but if we try hard we can slowly but surely become better persons. I'm always kicking myself for this or that.

And especially as ambitious artists and writers we will always have unfinished projects. I'd love to have a thing to put my name to properly, like a proper printed comic book or something.

But I think the best thing we can leave behind is lots of good and happy memories with our friends and family, and love them lots now while we still can. Life is incredibly fragile.
« Last Edit: February 12, 2020, 07:01:10 AM by suuper-san »
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Offline KeanFox

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Re: What if you died today?
« Reply #3 on: February 12, 2020, 04:38:56 PM »
One day I woke up with a pumping pain in my side that kept getting worst fast, It was the worst pain I ever felt. I couldn't stand or walk. The car ride to the hospital felt like forever. I thought that's it, I might be dying.
at the moment I had three thoughts
My mum in the car. I wanted to tell my mum that I love her but I didn't because I didn't want to freak her out.
Then I thought about the people that I was in the middle of doing something with, they will think that I detached on them. And lastly a short prayer. And that's about it. I'm "okay" now tho.

I'm not worried about what if I die now. But I get what you mean. I just hit 30 and I'm having a lot of regrets, and could have should have. 
I regret my money can't buy you happiness money is bad attitude.
Regret not keeping up with the stock market. I should have bought more stocks. I should have tried harder, not give up on ideas fast. Should have taken better care of my health. 

Offline Lord Kesashi

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Re: What if you died today?
« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2020, 07:22:33 PM »
Well the sad truth is you're completely incorrect. When you're dead it won't matter because you're dead. You're either not conscious or you have much bigger things to worry about in the afterlife. In fact that's one of the good thing about death is the absence of regret and fear and pain which makes it desirable for people who deal with a little too much of that.

You make it sound like death is just an out-of-body experience where you'll watch your corpse and think back on everything. Maybe it is, I'm not dead, so I can't say. But there is something applicable about the ideology that you could die tomorrow in terms of becoming more productive.

There is a psychological theory (I can't remember the name) that however much time you give yourself to do something, is the amount of time it will take you to do it. If that sounds confusing here's an example

If you give yourself 1 day to do something, you will do it in 1 day.
If you give yourself 1 year to do something, you will spend the whole year doing it even if you could've done it in one day.

Playing around with due dates could be a solution to increasing your productivity in life. I've even heard there are positive mental health benefits to making your bed every morning.

Offline MoonFlame

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Re: What if you died today?
« Reply #5 on: February 15, 2020, 05:47:00 AM »
Mr. lego: I think you're right, moderation is needed in every aspect of life, and when it comes to work it shoudnt be diferent, working to hard can even cause some stress disorders and such (at least thats what i heard).

For the things i have seen about your works, i think you did pretty well, there are so many drawings and manga pages i wouldn't even be able to count, so if you say you had a good run, i totally believe you, and i think if i where this hardworking, i would be pretty much satisfied in this aspect of my life, i know you said there where things you could do better, but is just like you said too, there are also things more important than work, its a shame i found myself giving way more attention to frivolous things than to the important ones.

Also as far as work is concerned I heard a quote. "When you're old and in retirement you're never going to say 'I wish I worked longer office hours' " as a regret.

It seems i have heard a similar thing some time ago, but in a different context, the quote i heard was from some kind of business man talking about the passion for your work, it was something like "Have you ever seen the passion of that actress about her work? once someone asked her how she would like to die and she said on stage..., ask anybody how that person would like to die, the person would never say in my office, working my a** off"

I think it probably takes guts to have a passion at that level, even after all i have said, i still cant say if i would like to die working till the end.

Mr. suuper life is indeed fragile, soo much that is scary, i already saw many reports about people who died making common thing, like fixing the roof, slipping on a stair, or eating. I remember i once choked with a fishbone, the fault was totally mine, i was eating in the dark and reading at the same time, when the bone slipped to my throat, i had to go to the hospital and get that endoscopy thing (it took 10 hours for them to attend me), i didnt though i would die at the time, and i wasnt even worried if i would feel satisfied if i died, in fact, i was even still reading the d*** novel that made me choke in the first place, my mom was more freaked out than i was, i probably didnt feel so alarmed because i got the feeling that it wasn't a life or dead situation, but i wonder if i would react the same if i had got a different feeling that time.

giving attention to the things that matter the most, like friends and family seems like a good thing to do indeed, now that you said it, i remembered that thing about "it doenst matter if you have money and etc... nothing matters if you dont have anyone you love or care about" something among these lines, i dont remember quite well but yeah, humans are social creatures... and we need to stick to each other more...

Also, is very kind of you to ask your parents for doing that.

Mr. Kean Oh my good, that seems terrible, i knew my problem was a fishbone, but having something and dont knowing what it is, is really scary. you where really smart about not saying anything to your mom, i wouldnt have thought that.

I am like 10 years younger than you but i also have my few collection of regrets, regrets for not learning new things when i had the chance, now i cant reap what i didnt sow, i regret not allowing myself to enjoy more good times during my youth with the friends i miss right now, regret for not asking the girl who was totally into me out, and i also regret not working harder when i had the chance to.

even though, i like to think these regrets helps us become a better person and learn our lessons in some kind of way i hope.

Mr. Kesashi don't worry, i am saying this in a figurative meaning, as long as you grasp the concept its ok, it's not like i am worried about the fact i may fell an endless regret for all the eternity, but its the feeling while alive about if i am really having a satisfactory life from the end point perspective... (or something like that).

I also believe that when you're dead, you probably wont really care about how your life was (probably), either for going to a different plan of existence, or not having the consciousness to question your life. Even though, i prefer not approaching too much these thoughts, as they seems to be a bit nihilistic at least for me...

This thing about productivity probably works on certain occasions, as long as i give myself a reasonable amount of time, it may increase my productivity, without decreasing the final product quality, but it seems really hard to discipline yourself to do that, i will give it a try...
looks like that's it, got to go...