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Author Topic: (Story Idea) Slay My Dragon's Undying Love (Pseudo Isekai)  (Read 2216 times)

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Offline SnowWarren

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(Story Idea) Slay My Dragon's Undying Love (Pseudo Isekai)
« on: November 28, 2019, 04:10:02 AM »
Another working title is "CEASE My Dragon's Love Eternal."

Due to a cosmic event, in an instant, literally half the Earth disappears and is replaced by half of a fantasy world inhabited by dragons, elves and so forth, even bringing an extra moon along for the ride. Twenty years later and while an uneasy peace has settled between the two half planets, tensions are high. Funnily enough, many creatures of the fantasy world have immigrated to the Earth half, lured by modern conveniences like electricity, health insurance and workers compensation.

Our protagonist is a 20-year-old girl struggling to find a job after having dropped out of college. Today marks an event that occurs once only every hundred years: a Lover's Moon, however, this event comes with a warning that one must be careful with whom they kiss on the night the Lover's Moon hangs in the sky. Naturally, she thinks this will the day she finally tells her boyfriend she loves him. Of course, hijinks ensue when she accidentally kisses the son of the dragon clan leader, an arrogant punk who lords his status over everyone and is what the word entitlement was invented for. The girl's luck being what it is, the young dragon is instantly enthralled by her becoming lovesick and declaring her his one true love.

Now she must deal with integrating a 7-foot dragon, that follows after her like a puppy, into her daily life and all the hilarity that ensues with it. This will not do, has he been spelled or has she been cursed? Reversing this travesty is paramount before her life completely falls apart.

The story does quite heavily rely on the joke that no one aside from the main character seems to want the spell broken and many hope this would give the humans greater influence with the dragon king. The king, to the girl's annoyance, isn't opposed either, as for one he doesn't believe in magic and two, his son has FINALLY started behaving like a true heir and started taking responsibility for his actions. The kings also fed up with having to fill out the damn insurance papers! In fact, the characters start to fear that should the spell be reversed, all the young dragons character development would be lost and he would return to his lazy ways.

- When in battle, the dragon prince declares that this world can basically go to hell in the protagonist isn't in it causing civilians to bunch up around her in hopes of being safe by proxy. The king's advisor also has to frequently pass her notes that read "I don't like a man who___" in order to motivate the prince.

- When I say dragons, I mean bipedal dragons wearing clothes like Drum Bunker Dragon from "Buddyfight" or Gabiru from "That Time I got Reincarnated as a Slime".

- I'm thinking that whenever he has to remove some of his armour or change clothes he'll give her a comment like "Gets ya in the mood, right?" causing the girl to look ill.

Sorry, this bit got so long.

Someone's already told me that in terms of plot, hijinks and weirdness, it sounds so Japanese, they're shocked it hasn't been done yet.

Offline Crackhead Johny

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Re: (Story Idea) Slay My Dragon's Undying Love (Pseudo Isekai)
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2020, 02:48:56 PM »
Someone's already told me that in terms of plot, hijinks and weirdness, it sounds so Japanese, they're shocked it hasn't been done yet.
Oh, it has been done. It has been done a lot. This dead horse has been flogged into paste.
I do not know how many anime and other features where "MC has to marry an unusual spouse" is in an ep, that I own. Could be a dragon, could be a hideous alien, could be a monster, could be a demon, could be a Vending Machine (Satellite Girl And Milk Cow bonus content that was better than the main feature. Best "Romance with a vending machine" manhwa I own).

Monsters in the modern world. AKA urban fantasy. I like that this is not isekai. isekai is so beaten to death these days. Weren't something like 75+% of last season's new releases isekai?

The number of times you suggest this will be funny has me worrying that all the "hilarity" will be copied from anime you have watched? I also get this feeling because the other stuff you describe I have seen again and again and again.
Japan has a rough time with humor. This is why "comedy" anime keeps recycling the same "jokes/humor", "Oh look the girl has hit the MC ofer and accident or misunderstanding again "Hahaha, this is as funny as a late stage cancer diagnosis, I can't get enough. ". Most anime humor has just been recycled since Ranma 1/2. Ranma was funny, copying Ranma is not funny.
Japanese comedy that is funny? Ping Pong Club is hilarious a few times over a long run, not worth it. Ranma 1/2 is the classic comedy. Excel Saga is pure win. Puni Puni Poemy has a few laughs. Shinesmen is full of laughs. Shin Chan is a spectacular regionalization.  Space Dandy was good. I'm probably leaving a few out.
Then there is anime that is not a comedy but has funny bits. Great teacher Onizuka for example.

The problem with comedy is that writers do not understand it. As a comedian your jokes are yours, you do not steal or copy jokes.
Hollywood writers just go joke stealing like they steal all the other parts of their stories. this has lead to known writers from say SNL or known joke stealers like Robin Williams getting banned from comedy clubs.
Joke stealers are despicable.
If you are going to do humor it has to be your humor and your jokes. If you can google it, cut it out. You do get some leeway for slapstick like groin strikes which have been around since the beginning of time ("Ow My Balls" shows how funny this old joke can be no matter how many times it has been done as long as you do it in a new/unexpected way.). You do not get any forgiveness for recycling old anime bits that are supposed to be "funny". "Why did the chicken cross the road?" probably got a laugh the first time it was told, it doesn't anymore.

In the internet age writing comedy is rough. All you need to do is put up your piece, have someone tweet your funny jokes and now they are not your jokes. If you are just stealing jokes, do not worry about this, they were not yours to begin with and you will get abused as a joke thief.
I have had to prune some of my really good jokes out of my book because I have told them in front of too people who shared them until someone published them publicly as their own. "Live long and Shocker" was mine for more than a year and I made people laugh with it so many times, I even tried to get several artists to photoshop up the classic Spock pic with him giving the shocker sign. Now when you google it you can find pics of Leonard freaking Nimoy giving the shocker sign. That joke is not mine anymore and so I can't use it.

So try to get someone knowledgeable to go through your jokes and let you know if they have seen or heard them before. Make sure this person will not tweet or retell any of your stuff. Do not let Dennis Leary do this job.

Offline Coryn

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Re: (Story Idea) Slay My Dragon's Undying Love (Pseudo Isekai)
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2020, 10:56:06 PM »
All that being said, remember that just because something has been 'done before', does not mean you aren't allowed to do it as well. After all, by this point almost everything HAS been done before. The key is to mix and match and make it your own. Plenty of things get redone, but if they are redone in a unique way from how they've been done before then you get something that feels familiar while still being new. Don't get discouraged because you find out someone has seen some aspect of what your created already. Use it as a way to find a new twist on the formula!

Will review stories upon request. My latest arc: http://goo.gl/KYgsfF

Offline MoonFlame

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Re: (Story Idea) Slay My Dragon's Undying Love (Pseudo Isekai)
« Reply #3 on: January 31, 2020, 04:11:33 AM »
This thing looks like the kind of story i would totally read, a fantasy world in a modern setting? its a rare theme, an isekai theme is saturated (but its also good sometimes), but the "modern isekai thing" sometimes brings us surprising things like "cop craft", "solo leveling" and "that one where the female knight becomes a farm girl (i just forgot the name)".

Anyways, you may see it like a comedy thing, but i became quite engaged with the romance your story seems to have, maybe normal people wont see any romantic feeling towards this story because the dragon boy doenst have human features and alike, but i think it would hit pretty good, and people would get used and end up liking, this is the kind of thing i guess is hard to try foreseeing, some times the public reaction is unpredictable.

comedy is always complicated, some people will find one story funny, others wont. As an self example i could say some stories i find funny and others that i dont, as well as the reason for that.

The first thing before i get started, is that japanese comedy such as other things that involves japanese culture overall, may have some cultural barriers and references that western people may quite not understand pretty well, so, sometimes is really hard creating a story that is both anatopic and anachronistic, for example, how many times have you ever watched "back to the future"? or "terminator"? these movies seems to never get old, and had made as many success in the USA as in my country, the thing is, other stories like "police academy" for example, no matter how many times i watch it today, i cant find it as funny as when i was a kid, and the same goes with regional and cultural references. That being said, some times you cant laugh a joke, not because it isnt funny, but because doenst have the background that makes that joke funny.

But of course, you're not japanese, having a western background can help you pretty much creating a story without any cultural barrier.

About the examples of comedy stories i said before, the first is nichijou, is more of an slice of life than a comedy show, but it try to incorporate comedy as well, so i will talk about it, the thing is, most of the jokes are way to heavy on japanese references and also depends on language quibbles, which makes the show quite hard for me to enjoy.

The other example is "Watamote", it does have some cultural references, but most of the jokes are created from the situations developed in the show, the first chapters depend heavily on cringy comedy and etc... but later on, aspects of the "weaboo" lifestyle comes into play, and for the weaboo people that understands that situations it became quite funny.

And the final example, is my bittersweet tragedy, an amazing plot, but worst ending ever, i think the story is a tragic comedy in its self essence: "Prison School", do you know the concept of punchline doenst you? something among the lines "unexpected comic or ironic events from a situations, are what makes a joke", this story takes this to the bitter end, unbelievable twists, that are both hilarious and unexpected are the heart of the comedy in this show, the scene where kyioshi instead of running away after being discovered in the girls bathroom, decides to takes his clothes off and follows chyio who cant see pretty clear because she lacks her glasses, sends shivers down my spine and a laugh to my heart

And lastly, find someone to read your story, and tell you if the jokes are good and etc... Study a little about how comedy situations are made and how humorists work and etc, when you create something, you will always find it amazing, because its you who did it, so a second opinion is always good to help, another good technic is letting your work some days in the closet, and reviewing it days later in a different mood.

Also, it doenst matter if hundreds, thousands or millions already did something like it, there will always be slots for someone new, as long as it is a refreshing story and not a blatant plagiarism, for example this season we have an isekai anime on launch, the next season we will have another one, and it will continue, as long as there are people who like this, they will look for stories similar to this.

Sorry, it seems i have written too much.
« Last Edit: January 31, 2020, 05:06:45 AM by MoonFlame »
looks like that's it, got to go...