So, I would like to share an idea I have worked on for the last year, give or take a few months. And while I have written quite a few other stories, basically all of them are in german, so I apologize if my syntax or phrasing should have suffered from the translation. Now onto the actual premise of this idea:
The story plays in the eponymous world Sordem, which (in the current draft) looks like this:
Sadly, this world is in the turmoils of war, but not the average Fantasy War alá Good vs. Evil and knights in shining armors fighting against savage beasts with gleaming weapons and archaic magic. No, this war between the nations and the sapient species, that inhabit them, is fought in muddy trenches, under the grueling fire of artillery shells and the deathly rattle of machine guns. This fantasy world is in the midst of their very own Great War, the first industrial conflict in their history. This is a war with no place for chosen ones, who are destined to save the world, but instead for thousands of nameless humans, harpies, centaurs, satyrs, elfs and other races to fight and die in No Man's land, where magic is not an ancient discipline or a talent, someone is born with, but a phenomenon, that only emerged a mere hundred years ago. Only now scientist are able to understand the basic principles of this new and arcane knowledge, just in time for a merciless arm's race between the warring nations, as they try their best to use this new source of energy and possibilities to gain the upper hand in a war that has grind to a bloody stalemate.
So much about the blurb, now onto the ...
SettingWhile culture and living standards in Sordem are similar to the early 20th century of our history, there are two very major differences. First, there are several different sapient races, which are, while still (mostly) able to reproduce with one another, vastly different in appearance. The 8 main species are: human, harpy, centaur, satyr, elf (although in their current design not as bland as human-beauty-standard-with-pointed-ears-slapped-on-to-it, which I have seen far to many times), snake people (while this is not their name in the story, it is the best frame of reference to get on the same page quickly), arachne and "Druela", a species which I have no accurate widely known mythological species to compare them to, while other species, like the ghirtablilu, are not of a primary concern for now. For starters, let's just remember that these races, while their appearance is directly lifted from said well known mythological creatures, have their own distinct cultures, abilities and, just like human ethnicities, traditional territories. Therefore, while none of the nations in this world are homogeneously populated by only one race, most of them are dominated by one. These nations, as can sometimes be seen quite clearly on the provisional flag, are strongly inspired by the major powers during the first world War. I don't want to delve to deep for now, but if you are interested, I would be more than happy to talk more about them at a later date.
The second important difference is the way magic works in this world. I wanted to try a new magic system, one that is fitting for the industrial, grinding and yet ever escalating warfare of the Great War. I came up with a, in my opinion, quite original hard magic system. But first, the basic backstory:
102 years before the current date, during this worls equivalent of the battle of Leipzig (1813), a portal suddenly appeared in the sky, visible around half the world. As it turned out, this "Nexus" as it was later called, actually works as a gateway to another plane of existence, which was, in lack of any information of its nature, named "Pandemonium" (based on the mass panics that broke out as the nexus appeared). But it took another couple of decades until it was discovered, that energy could be transferred between this plane and our own world, initiated and directed by certain runes, if these were assembled in the correct algorithm. This meant that it was now able to circumvent the 1st and 2nd Law of thermodynamics, which is tantamount with magic. But it took many years of trial-and-error to find out, how the symbols had to be designed to be able to serve as runes, and many more to identify their meaning in an algorithm. As it turned out, the more the runes deviate from the ideal (and possibly unknown), "true" rune, or the more vage the description of the algorithm is formulated, the less efficient the transition of energy becomes. This alone wouldn't be a problem, if there weren't two more properties of arcane processes: 1. Whatever the actual purpose of the arcane algorithm may be, it always emits an aura of entropy. This means that every materials corrosion in it's immediate vicinity is accelerated. Each material is more or less resistant against this, which also limits the amount of energy, you can draw from or send to the Pandemonium: A few runes on a piece of paper can't channel Megajoules of energy, it would just burst out in flames, while the exact same algorithm, carved in a block of massive lead, may accomplish it. The last property of arcane processes is also the most enigmatic: Each algorithm needs to have contact with a so called "initiator element": tissue of a living, sapient being to start the process, tests with animals returned negative results. While dead tissue like hairs or skin doesn't work, and fresh brain matter shows the best efficiency, blood is the most commonly used initiator element. But this also means, that each arcane process is coupled to a living being: If it dies, the process stops, if the runes of the algorithm are vage or crudely drawn, the efficiency of it drops dangerously low, with the following consequences: If the goal of the algorithm was to extract energy from the Pandemonium, for example in the form of thermic energy as a burst of plasma in the material world, a low efficiency means, that a certain percentage of the required energy can't be absorbed from the pandemonium and has to be taken from the coupled organism, which may therefore freeze to death. An endothermic process, which shall take energy from the material world and transport it into the pandemonium, may cause the neural system of the concerned organism to degenerate under the accumulating "waste heat".
That's the gist of it. Thanks for reading it, I know it may have been a bit complex here and there but I think that this clear cut hard-magic system allows for interesting engagements, and makes a last-minute victory thanks to a magical shenaningan seem less like an ass-pull and more like an intellectual triumph of our main characters, because of the clearly defined rules and boundaries of magic. Which leads uns nicely into the final part:
StoryThe story follows our human Protagonist Jacob von Zollmark (although I am not yet sure about his first name), a college student of arcane studies, who gets sucked into the war, partly by his aristocratic father who wishes his son to follow the prestigious military career he once took himself, partly by his own ambitions to rise to prominence. All to soon he realises that there is no glory to grasp in the bloody trench warfare and the archaic tactics of old generals like his own father lead to the pointless deaths of thousands. From there on, the viewer follows his struggle in the horrifying battlefields of the ever-escalatig war and his slow and hard fought ascent in the military, while the continous improvements in arcane technology let the war differ more and more from the Great War our own world has seen into something even more threatening. We follow him as he witnesses atrocities, unheard of before, like genocide and chemical warfare, and as he loses friends he made in the trenches, as he questions the purpose of this war and his ideals and as he survives dangerous encounters by cleverness and tactical thought.
Since I have worked on this for quite a long time, the outline of the story is in an advanced state, so I don't want to spend to much time on explaining the entire story, but this is the premise. So now I am asking you, if you think this idea has potential, and if a writer woud be enticed enough to help me fill out a few of the gaps, give his perspective on already finished scenes and so on. And on a sidenote: I know this is not the "looking for artist"-subforum, but if someone is interested, I would be more than happy to collaborate, since I have basically no artistic skills.
I guess that is all I have to say for now. I am sure I could keep talking about the finer details of the story, the nations and their culture, examples of magic use, the entities in the pandemonium and so on for hours, but if I wasn't able to get your interest with what I have said up until now, I doubt I can get it with this. Now it is on you: What do you think of this so far and would you be willing to explore this world further?