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Author Topic: Class 12-K Discussion  (Read 2995 times)

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Offline DevilPogoStick

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Class 12-K Discussion
« on: September 26, 2015, 11:00:20 AM »
Yeah, I think I'll make all discussions regarding stories and characters in the Class 12-K Verse (aka Kaimon Verse) here.

Hope you guys enjoy the stories so far!

Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #1 on: September 29, 2015, 01:21:33 PM »
Hmmm, to be honest, I'm not sure what  to start off with for a discussion. For one, many thanks for looking into the short tales posted so far, you guys rock.

What kind of tales would you guys like to see? :)

Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #2 on: October 21, 2015, 01:17:33 AM »
Well, seeing how Class 12-K's main cast is composed of 2nd year high school students, I guess I should share the Kaimon High school uniforms as to better visualize them in the short stories...Because I did not mention them at all...Apologies all round.

Since I don't really have the skills to draw a school uniform (well, to the point I am satisfied with it without my art making them look really bad), I resorted to using both a uniform maker (by Hapuriainen in Deviantart) and a anime image (from Kuroko no Basket) to show off the girls and boys uniforms respectively.

Girls:


Boys:


...But yes, those are the school uniforms I visualize when I write stuff that may involve explosions or an idiot pulling a ill-tempered girl's ponytail. XD

Hope that tidbit was useful....Somewhat! XD
« Last Edit: October 21, 2015, 02:23:41 PM by DevilPogoStick »

Offline legomaestro

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #3 on: October 24, 2015, 02:48:19 PM »
Mini Review from Chapter 1 - 10


Okay, I took a stab at reading your work. I don't have much to say but I do have some personal thoughts on it that I hope hep in one form or the other. I didn't have enough time to go for a word by word analysis as I've been swamped.

So firstly I've read up to 10 of the stories. The slapstick genre has really always been hard for me to get into, and is especially harder for me when they're not in visual form. Not to say it's impossible to make hilarious written work. I still have this story: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Jiggy-McCue-The-Killer-Underpants/dp/1408324253  to thank for waking me up to that fact. I've also seen some pretty hilarious writing online (heck here) too so I know it can be done well.

The main problem for me is that there's never story progression in slapstick things. I love a good laugh and if the characters can grow on me even better. I barely forgive Gintama because they're just hilarious through and through, but prefer Sayonara Zetsubuo Sensei because it concluded in a relatively reasonable time.

I feel your characters sort of blend into eachother? It's great that you have art for them showing how distinct they are, but their reactions all seem the same, and while the pure silliness of their lives is funny sometimes it wore me down because I felt no story progression. This is definitely a personal issue for me though with this genre, so I won't focus on that too much. But the characters could use some work. Maybe have some people who act normally to balance out the craziness?

As for the format I can definitely tell it's something that'd work out in a comic form. I'd definitely enjoy things more if they were like that.

The story plots really feel like they're from the heart and the narrator notes are really interesting and nice to see. I enjoyed the Carpenter and Contact Lenses stories in particular. (However the Carpenter one has a number of mistakes. Some proofreading may need to be done).

I think for this to work it's really important that the characters are distinctive in some way other than their physical appearances. The reason why I enjoy story progression is because that's how you make memoreable living characters, rather than infinite short stories where they stay pretty much the same.


I think though so long as you keep writing you'll find distinctive voices for your characters and make the humour hit home more. I enjoyed the stories that had the interesting funny notes and some form of logic (the pony tail one felt cruel more than funny to me haha...)


All in all keep writing! And keep up the good work. Your output is impressive. I'm not sure if my critique helps especially since I haven't read the latest yet but I hope it gives you an idea.


Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #4 on: October 24, 2015, 03:15:50 PM »
Thank you very much on the critique :)

Yeah, the characters do more or less blend together which does get pretty problematic and this is mostly a slapstick story for sure. Very glad you managed to check it out despite the disadvantages it gives.

I don't know if the rest of the short stories will some improvement regarding the characters but I hope it kinda entertains ya a bit more so. :)

Offline Synctual

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #5 on: October 25, 2015, 02:20:53 PM »
Alright, time for my somewhat review for some short stories! :-)

Now, I didn't read all of the chapters. I only read 7 of them so far, but that's only because today is gonna be a busy day for me. But anyway, let's get on with this!

I'm not usually into stories like this because I find that they're not for me, but I really liked this. The characters are interesting and fun, although a lot of them are very alike when it comes to their wackiness, which isn't much of a problem. But I agree with Lego in saying that you might want to add some "normal" characters.

The format you used was very simple and easy to follow, which is great for a story like this. And the 'Author Notes' are a great idea and really lets you know that the author is just as crazy as the people in Kaimon.  :tongue:

I have to say, I liked the Love Advice and Button Pushing stories the most. The 4th story for being really interesting to me and the 7th story for being equally interesting and even funny a bit. I can feel the comedy is there, even if it doesn't make me laugh, but I'm sure if this ever gets drawn, it'd be hilarious. And that's because I feel like stories such as these need illustration, but that's mostly for the comedy, because I'd love to see their faces when they react to the wacky things that they deal with. But that's personal preference, and even then it doesn't take away much from the story.

Overall, I liked it and will definitely be reading more in my spare time. So keep them coming man!  :thumbsup:

Put This Here To Make You Sad
My Story
Rock Star! (Shonen)

Offline Synctual

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #6 on: October 25, 2015, 02:36:26 PM »
And now for the AMA! Here comes some question for ya! :-)

1) What inspired you to write such a story? Do you read/watch many manga/anime similar to your story?

2) How long will you be writing this story and are you planning on having this drawn?

3) How long have you been working on this story?

Put This Here To Make You Sad
My Story
Rock Star! (Shonen)

Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2015, 09:53:14 PM »
And now for the AMA! Here comes some question for ya! :-)

1) What inspired you to write such a story? Do you read/watch many manga/anime similar to your story?

2) How long will you be writing this story and are you planning on having this drawn?

3) How long have you been working on this story?


1. I admit, I was kinda inspired to do a wacky slice of life from...Nearly all the said genre I have watched so far. XD

But the biggest surprise was that Class 12-K was originally a spin-off humor series for an otherwise action shonen series that never got around and may no longer apply to the current work (...Maxtaro was a combat mage in the first draft).

2. Oh, it's sorta in a slight slump (have two planned stories, a few more still not even written) but this is gonna stick.

3. Since 2009 did I actually start writing Class 12-K (Really Short Stories is the current "canon" work with a few other major pieces being worked into it)

Offline Vacant

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #8 on: October 26, 2015, 11:56:28 AM »
Okay sorry for the lateness, but I have finally managed to read and now time for the review. Will be a little different, since I can't really critique each individual chapter.


First Impressions:
             So it's quite different to anything I've read here for a while.  I can easily envision these being animated 5 minute shorts akin to a haruhi chan ones. But it feels like there's something......missing. The style reminds me of Baka and Test, Haganai, noucome etc., you know the whacky comedy school themed shows? While they generally have self contained episodic adventures. We tend to have proper introductions for each cast member, which I feel would add a lot of weight into these chapters. I had to keep going back to the Character list to know who was who and how they were linked together. Of course as said before, being drawn out would make it easier to distinguish the characters and their facial expressions and such, so it's a drawback for all script form writing. ALthough, props on the artwork, its nice to see how the creator envisions their characters.

What I liked:
-Once I got used to the layout and format, I liked it and could follow it okay. The editor's notes and the kind of story introductions are an unusual touch, but I really liked them. It's almost like having a friend tell you the story, rather than just reading a page of writing from a stranger.
-Character notes were clear and gave me a good feel for what you'd envisioned for the characters relationships and personalities.
-I liked the 6th chapter the most I think. For one it shows how the class functions and how crazy the school is. How he can just bust down the principal's door like that. For me its the one story that shows Maxtaro in a good light. He's a jerk, but he can help the rest of his friends. It felt like I got the measure of the teachers and Maxtaro, as well as some of the background character. I liked chapter 3 for this reason too. I guess I like the chapters where I learn a bit about the characters and how they tick the most.
-Oh yeah, Chapter 2. A good twist on the ending, I liked that little bit, its a comedy classic.

Things I Would Work On
-For me, the biggest flaw is chapter one. I didn't like Maxtaro in it. He just seems a bit of a douche pulling his girlfriend's hair constantly. Remember, this is the first chapter so this is our first taste of Maxtaro. Since there doesn't seem to be any chronologic order to the chapters, I'd say it may be better served as being a later story.
-Going off that, I would replace the first chapter with some kind of introductory chapter to the 4 main characters. Heck you could do chapter 1-4 focusing on each one of them. I just feel that if the characters have some foundations laid in the beginning, then we can follow their off the wall adventures with more of an investment in them. But it is a series of comedic shorts and I'm more thinking in terms of longer stories, but it would something I'd suggest anywho.
-A lot of Sweatdrops. I understand what it's representing, but when its written down you can really see how many there are and it looks a lot, I'd possibly look at changing a couple of them up. Just so the same reaction is presented in every conversation.

Overall:
                I read the first chapter and wasn't feeling it. But after reading on, it grew on me. There's some good bits of comedy in here, certainly with a crazy cast too, who once we get to know a bit about become more fleshed out. One thing that shines through is your enjoyment from writing these. I can tell from the editors notes that you're loving this, possibly even taking personal experiences and moulding them into the story? Anyway, I say keep it up :)

Offline Vacant

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #9 on: October 26, 2015, 11:58:55 AM »
AMA TIME! :D

1.) Are any of the characters/story themes based off personal experiences?

2.) Whats the plan for these going forward? Do you plan to get them illustrated, or create a light novel spin off?

3.) Who's your favourite Character in the series?

4.) Where did the name come from? Any special reason for 12-K?

Offline legomaestro

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #10 on: October 26, 2015, 12:30:26 PM »
My AMA

1. What is your writing process like ?
2. Do you have a clear picture of the setting that the characters live in?
3. Do you plan any story arcs?
4. If this became an anime what art style would you have it in?
5. Is there any reason you capitalize Hell? haha

Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #11 on: October 26, 2015, 02:03:31 PM »
Oh my god, so many things I wanna discuss about but still in training! Lol

No worries, I'm gonna be late but will address all that is posted once I get back to my hotel room. :)

Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #12 on: October 26, 2015, 07:25:25 PM »
Alright, awesome on the critique there Vacant, thank you so much on that!

AMA TIME! :D

1.) Are any of the characters/story themes based off personal experiences?

2.) Whats the plan for these going forward? Do you plan to get them illustrated, or create a light novel spin off?

3.) Who's your favourite Character in the series?

4.) Where did the name come from? Any special reason for 12-K?

1. To be honest, it's kinda so-so on that. Real life was kinda quiet on my end...Though I admit most of the books I read are kinda the inspiration...As well as certain events in high school (though I won't name people and what crazy stuff happened lol).

2. Well, to be honest, I might write more shorts, a little more backstory, and maybe actually write about the delinquent history the town of Kaimon has (which is it's own little tale).

3. Nothing special, it pretty much showcase just how...Absurd Kaimon is. I thought to myself, we always got basic class names like 1-a, 1-b, etc....How bout an insanely high number and a letter nobody would ever expect? XD

My AMA

1. What is your writing process like ?
2. Do you have a clear picture of the setting that the characters live in?
3. Do you plan any story arcs?
4. If this became an anime what art style would you have it in?
5. Is there any reason you capitalize Hell? haha

1. To be honest, once I find a concept for a tale...It'll be expanded upon if it works.

2. Kinda clear, the town of Kaimon for example was founded by a pirate named Ueki Kaimon....Who somehow managed to twist the arm of the Shogunate to give him a piece of land for saving the country in what amounts to a suicidal task that said government thought would get rid of Kaimon...Only for him to turn the tables in an insane gambit that somehow works.

3. More or less on that, as I did plan some long actual stories that involves the Kaimon verse (one of them, Gangsters War for Cake, is posted at the forums) and they tend to form an actual narrative...Over what might be ridiculous plots. XD

4. Not sure on a true art style, maybe something in a Shonen art style would work.

5. Hey, I treat Hell like it's important XD

Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #13 on: October 26, 2015, 09:11:44 PM »
Oh right, I forgot to mention, I just recalled an old work that may as well be the one thing that really inspired Class 12-K once I got into the comedy and away from the old plans of making it an action shonen series.

Wayside School.

When I was a kid...Those books were hilarious. Really enjoyed it.

I mean sure, the series is about an elementary school instead of high school but it wouldn't be too out of place in an anime....Though Wayside did have a Cartoon (but it wasn't as fun I admit).

Offline DevilPogoStick

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Re: Class 12-K Discussion
« Reply #14 on: October 27, 2015, 12:03:24 AM »
Whoops, forgot Vacant's question bout favorite character....mainly the main four but especially Nagase (...she somehow gets sillier) lol.