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Author Topic: This Raider War Of Mine  (Read 1989 times)

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Offline GingerStark

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This Raider War Of Mine
« on: March 19, 2015, 01:25:30 PM »
This Raider War Of Mine:
A mix of This War Of Mine and the manga raiders community, meant to create a neat anthology story.

(This is very unfinished, but just wanted to put it out there whilst I'm working on it. My first writing without my sensei Echo_Hiver mentoring me)


"Don't tell me you're scared of an empty shopping mall"

Echo chewed her lip in contemplation at Coryn's remark. It had been hours since the artillery and gunfire had stopped, and with that any safe chance of scavenging MR City. The eerie silence of yesterday's battle gave little consolation to her mind however.

"And don't tell me you're expecting quietness to equal safety"

Coryn dismissed her reply. This was his fourth scavenging run into the ruins of the shopping district ever since the conflict started three months ago. He grinned as he tapped his spade onto the concrete pavement.

"You're paranoid. We'll be quicker than speeding ticket." He chuckled at his pun "Grab those meds, any food along the way, and spade any sod who stops us"

Echo eyed the spade dubiously "At least if anyone kills us, they have the tools to bury the bodies"

Her fingers fumbled around a necklace on her neck, she rubbed it's silver crucifix reassuringly.

The duo scurried over to the wall of the shopping mall, and trailed along it to a broken window. Coryn peered in, spade at the ready. He gave a sharp whistle and waited.

"Yeah, looks abandoned" He whispered

"I've got the torches" echo said

Climbing in, the two cast their lights into the darkness. Many of the shelves were looted or turned over, and rubbish littered the floor. Echo took Coryns lead as he began to scour the remains of anything he could find. Slowly pacing to the pharmacist, they manage to acquire two canned peaches, an opened box of alpen, and a couple of celebrity magazines.

"I wonder how these celebrities are doing?" Echo said "Held up in their mansions... Fretting over no more Starbucks..." She turned to her comrade for a reply "Coryn?"

Coryn was busy stretching a bra he found.

"CORYN!?" Echo nearly fell over

"Relax sister, it's just a bra" He said, studying it

Echo wiped a sweat from her forehead "This is not the time to indulge in perversions"

"I don't see no Persians"

"Perversions"

"Ah right. No, it's not what you think" He stretched the bra again "The elastic in these things are quite useful, heck I bet I could make a sling out of this and some stones"

Sighing, echo turned her attention elsewhere. She spotted an overturned shopping trolley. Picking it up, she walked over to Coryn and loaded the supplies onto it.

"We can carry more with this" Echo said

Coryn nodded "Good thinking" He plonked the bra onto it

"I wish this siege would end soon" Echo pushed the trolley

"The rebels have the upper hand, soon they'll break into Mayor Hasith's palace and it'll all be over" Coryn commented "That's what the radio said at least. We need more batteries for that."

The pharmacy was in sight, though the counter was just as bad in shape as the rest of the store. A part of the ceiling had collapsed onto it.

Coryn readied his spade "I'll move the debris, you look for anything else in the area"

Echo left the trolley and glanced out of a broken window, she could see smoke rising in the distance. Most probably from the gated suburban communities in the west of the city.

"Jeez... That's where the celebrities are..."

She turned away and walked back to the trolley. Or at least tried to, until she tripped over something.

"What the fudge?"

A part of the floor which had been shipped away. Upon closer inspection, there seemed to be a makeshift trap door. Echo cautiously opened it, clearing away the dust, and saw about a dozen different food items.

"God watch over me..." She gasped

Candy bars, whiskey, honey, powdered milk, dried beef, and cigarettes. She hadn't seen these items in a long time, let alone altogether. Staring in amazement for a good minute, she hurriedly scooped these items into her arms and dumped them into the trolley. Echo almost smirked at the possible reactions on Coryn's face, the praise from her friends at home, and the taste of a Mars Bar.

Coryn appeared with a handful of medications. He had them tucked away in the cups of his bra, which he had clipped around his waist.

"I found some anti-biotics, peroxide, and half a tube of heat rub" He shook his waist, rattling the items to emphasise his point

Echo was caught between half a proud smirk and half a wince.

"Great" She replied "I found some stuff... Milk, honey, beef... You know, the usual"

"Very funny" Coryn stuck his tongue out "Very f-"

Squealing a little, he stared at the mass of food.

"Where did you get all that?" He asked

"God has shown me the way!"
 
"Great great, but no really, where did you get all that?"
 
"...Found it in a trapdoor on the floor"
 
Deflated, echo looked like a kid whose candy was stolen. In a pitiful move, Coryn patted her on the head, though echo just looked at him blankly. Coryn slowly retracted his hand and stuttered.
 
"That... Was awkward. Never doing that again."
 
"We got everything we need" Echo grabbed the trolley "Shall we get a move on?"
 
Coryn nodded "Absolutely, let's show the guys what we got"


 
-----Chapter Two------------------------------------------------------------
 
LegoMichone never liked silence. Bullets and bombs kept away people, and the less human contact, the better.
 
Bubble bubble bubble.
 
Turning off the oven, LegoMichone poured the boiling water into a cup and left it to cool. He had much experience with managing scare water supplies. Now reduced to taking water from the neighbours pond and heating it to kill germs, he feared this problem would only get worse.
 
He leaned against the counter and sighed.
 
"Lucky I have you, Mae" he patted the katana sheafed into his belt holster "Humans are too evil to trust"
 
Quickly checking the water, it was of a drinkable temperature. He took the cup and walked out the kitchen, last the living room, down into the basement and next to the bed where a blue haired, spectacled woman lay scribbling on a crossword.
 
"Here's your water, Lorenx" He grunted
 
Lorenx lowered the puzzle and glanced up at Lego. She was a bit pale, her nose dripping mucus.
 
"Wearing green today?" She took the cup "You look like a frog"
 
"Says the mermaid wannabe"
 
The exchanged a short chuckle, but returned to their grim mood. Lego sat down at a bed on the other side of the room. This was probably the most interaction he had all week; he only came to this house 2 months back when his last group decided to turn to raiding. This diluted his little trust in humanity, and ever since decided to stick where it was most secure and inactive.
 
"When will Coryn be back?" He asked
 
"Depends" Lorenx sat up slightly "Where did you come from, where did you go?"
 
Coryn smashed through the basement door on cue "WHERE DID YOU COME FROM COTTON EYE JOE"
 
Echo tailed in, slightly shaken at what just happened.
 
"Still on your deathbed Lorenx?" Coryn approach her grinning
 
Lorenx barely moved "Hm"
 
Throwing her a pack of antibiotics, he laughed "Here, I got you some meds to chew on"
 
"Hey, I found them!" Echo interjected
 
"It was a team effort echo"
 
Lorenx took a pill out "I trust the Canadian, their healthcare is more liberal"
 
"You trying to be punny?"
 
As the group bickered, Lego curiously glanced over the abundance of supplies the duo had brought. He raised a cautious eyebrow.
 
"Where did you get these from?"
 
Jumping in front of him, echo raised a hand "Meeeeee!" She puffed her chest out "I found them under a trapdoor"
 
Lego hummed in thought "The only way you could get this much food is if you worked at that brothel in town centre for a week... Or killed the soldiers working there and stole it"
 
"W-we did no such thing!"
 
"Not you" He looked at the food "Previous owner might've"
 
Echo swallowed a little. She didn't take the time to think about who the food might have belonged to. Her rumbling belly seemed to drown out a lot of logic nowadays.
 
"Sorry..." She bowed
 
Lego stood up from the bed and made his way to the door.
 
"Where do you think you're going?" Coryn called out, his bra swaying to his movements
 
"Need to clear my head" He replied
 
Echo looked at Coryn, who shrugged. She then followed the quiet man.
 
They ended up outside their house in the front garden. The street was choked with empty cars, random debris, and overgrown fauna. The sun was starting to set, casting a bronze hue on MR City.
 
"You're not going to the shopping mall are you?" Echo asked
 
"I need to find out whether this food source could be a potential threat" He Unsheathes his katana "you'd best stay away"
 
Echo stood defiant "No, it's my responsibility too"
 
Lego looked at her, then silently nodded. The two set off into the distance.
 



---------------------------------------------------------Needs finishing--------------
« Last Edit: March 20, 2015, 02:41:52 PM by GingerChibbs »

Offline Coryn

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2015, 01:52:46 PM »
you've had my input, looking forward to the next chapter!

Will review stories upon request. My latest arc: http://goo.gl/KYgsfF

Offline GingerStark

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #2 on: March 19, 2015, 02:10:14 PM »
Thank you, I look forward to your next feedback  :thumbsup:

Offline Echo_River

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2015, 03:37:16 PM »
Ahhh, you've put the second part up XD (You can put them in spoilers, y'know. Easier for location.)

This is a rather futuristic MR O_O Is that why Lego's name is different? Or Lego in general...I don't recall him ever naming his katana....
And swords go into sheaths, not holsters XD Those are for handguns O_O

Few typos here and there. (My name already got lowercased a few times ._.)
Hope to see more!
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Offline swearzy

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #4 on: March 20, 2015, 03:57:47 PM »
Michone as in the walking deads michone? Coz she has a katana also.. lol. For the sheath you could also use scabbard, or since its a Japanese Katana you could stow it in it's Saya

Offline Coryn

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #5 on: March 20, 2015, 04:46:13 PM »
yeah, might be good to announce when you've put up a new part Ginger.

interesting set up though. things seem to be getting more serious. nice cotton eye joe reference.


fun fact: lego used to use guns quite a bit. made of the same nano tech as his sword(s) so it almost works to have holsters for swords. but i digress.

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Offline swearzy

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #6 on: March 20, 2015, 05:21:44 PM »
so it can turn into a gun?

Offline Coryn

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #7 on: March 20, 2015, 05:47:36 PM »
well, in the prime verse. probably not here. just making the comment.

Will review stories upon request. My latest arc: http://goo.gl/KYgsfF

Offline GingerStark

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #8 on: March 20, 2015, 06:09:55 PM »
Echo: Gah, forgot about that, I'll put them in spoilers next time!
Lego is basically michone since they both have dreadlocks (I believe) and similar characters  :ninja:

There are many mistakes, I did most of this whilst in a bad lecture on the IPhone, so I'll give it a good prof read when I can  :thumbsup:

Coryn: Indeed, I'll try to announce next time  :ninja: I'll drift between comedy and thrills, see what tests my writing skills more  :hmm: Huh, maybe I can refer to nano tech in the story  :ohmy:

Swearzy: michone indeed  8) Expect much from LegoMichone... Somebody needs to tell him this

Offline Coryn

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #9 on: March 20, 2015, 06:17:14 PM »
Lego actually has a fro Ginger. Though for the purpose of alternate universe apocalypse Lego, you can give him whatever hair you want I guess.

Will review stories upon request. My latest arc: http://goo.gl/KYgsfF

Offline GingerStark

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #10 on: March 20, 2015, 06:26:19 PM »
 :ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy:

Well... Anything can happen in three months  :sure:

Offline swearzy

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #11 on: March 20, 2015, 07:06:11 PM »
The fro would be down without special hair care products ;)

Offline Lovus Eternius

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #12 on: March 21, 2015, 03:07:05 AM »
I shall cast a green and purple shadow over the earth.

Offline NO1SY

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #13 on: March 21, 2015, 09:28:48 AM »
Haha! You wrote more! Good Stuff! :biggrin:

Offline legomaestro

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Re: This Raider War Of Mine
« Reply #14 on: March 21, 2015, 04:41:41 PM »
Foolish mortals!  The Fro can survive on its own! In fact it'll out live its host

Interesting stuff ginger,  although I'm definitely missing references here,  let alone where the title came from

Lookingforwards to more.  Funny thing is I too was suspicious of the convenient stash found.  Walking Dead telltalegames trauma