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Author Topic: "Enchiridion" Development Thread  (Read 3719 times)

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Offline Lumaria

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #45 on: January 02, 2015, 01:04:06 AM »
i have referred to the issues is specific, but so far, its just "draw as you go, and hope it works out".
Stop playing victim....you know what you did.

Offline Lovus Eternius

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #46 on: January 02, 2015, 01:21:14 AM »
I would also like to be the first to give you the advice of giving yourself an objective and being open to making changes when the product is 'finished'.

Offline darlingGrim

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #47 on: January 02, 2015, 01:26:54 AM »
honestly...theres way too much information to try to put it into a one-shot. its not designed to be a oneshot either.

Ah, no you're not understanding. A lot of long running series start off with a oneshot. It's sort of like a proof of concept. To see if you'd even have an audience interested. Or to gather attention.

Sort of like a "I have this idea, here it is". D.Gray Man started as a oneshot called Zone! It showed what kind of story she wanted to tell and layed out the basic principles. When it got approved for a series she turned it into D.Gray Man. :D Oh! One Piece also started off as Romance Dawn.

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My only advice to you (as of now) is to ignore that discouraging feeling that set deep into your heart from the reviews Lorenx provides until she tell you what it is that she is referring to in the early development of your story (in which things are bound to change at a whim).

-coughs-

Inspiring quote of the day: You have potential, keep it safe... no matter what hideous abomination of nature rips forth from the shadows in a futile attempt to take you by surprise.
Also Lorenx1 means well. I think she has the same sounding harsher than intended problem I do. So I don't really mind. Also, now I want to think of a really cool abomination of of Nature. I imagined a shadow snake for some reason.
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I would also like to be the first to give you the advice of giving yourself an objective and being open to making changes when the product is 'finished'.
I intend for this to be the oneshot, "proof of concept version" so even if I do finish it I intend to redo it later. That's why everything from the names to the designs aren't finished. :D I still plan on posting this Oneshot's finished version once I get there.

Offline Lovus Eternius

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #48 on: January 02, 2015, 01:36:45 AM »
I imagined a shadow snake for some reason.
Well... I imagined a... "SOLID SNAKE".

LOOOOOOOOOOL!

Offline Lumaria

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #49 on: January 02, 2015, 02:25:30 AM »
the basic concept has alot going on though.
Stop playing victim....you know what you did.

Offline Von

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #50 on: January 02, 2015, 02:57:19 AM »
Great work loved  your character :heart:

Offline WhiteCrow

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #51 on: January 02, 2015, 05:08:48 AM »
I would like to comment on the story:

What was her mothers hobby and why would searching temples help the MC find her?

Is your intent to have the beast follow the MC on her quest?

What a kind of get from this is a light-hearted Tomb Raider vibe, which might fit well considering that almost all of the games dealt with modern-day world blending with supernatural things.

The only thing I would say is that the game between the Gods and the quest of your MC should probably be linked in some way, I mean most times it's very hard to properly write a situation where the affairs of Gods can be affected by humans.

Lastly, for some reason im having a hard time figuring out what it is you're having trouble with in terms of where to go with the story... do you mean in terms of overall direction or just in terms of what happens next?

Offline darlingGrim

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #52 on: January 02, 2015, 05:51:12 AM »
Thank you Von!  :heart:

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Yes the beast (cautiously named Rel) will accompany her. The setting is more medieval. No guns exist. (Yet?) They might invent it idk yet.

My main issue is having locations for her to go, and events for her to encounter. I don't want her to just go temple to temple (plus 2 of the temples have already been discovered and secured in the human territories). I've never been good at coming up with moral situations that can make the reader cry. But I want to be able to help flesh out the world by telling minor events with side characters.
« Last Edit: February 11, 2015, 10:47:37 PM by darlingGrim »

Offline MK

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #53 on: January 02, 2015, 06:04:58 AM »
I think you should just release this as a series, way too much info for just a one shot.  Btw they only continue one shots in Japan if it is a good series not so much to get popular.  Once you have a publisher you are pretty much set up as long as your story is interesting enough to gain money for the company

Offline darlingGrim

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #54 on: January 04, 2015, 01:44:48 AM »
Hmm, I still plan on redoing it later tho. So calling this version a oneshot is easier. I don't think it's too much for a oneshot. Oneshot's don't have to tell the entire story. I'm not going to cram everything I planned out into one chapter I'm just going to put the important bits in.

Yes, but popularity is a good way to tell if a series is good. That's why they have survey's in the back of the manga magazines to tell which series are the most popular so they know which ones to promote and which ones to cut. Although this isn't Japan.
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Well, other than that I drafted 4 more pages. Although, this isn't the final design for the beast, it's along the line of how I want the beast to look. I'm unsure the level of death I should put in this story. Obviously I can't make it so all the knights/warriors come out unscathed.
Spoiler
I was planning on Fiore holding Rel (the beast) accountable by using his orb (if it breaks he 'dies' so she'll have him in a deadlock later). Maybe I should just make some of the knights get knocked unconscious and others run away. ;>.> [/spoilers]

Here are the pages. I'll probably keep uploading them in 4's or maybe 6's.
Spoiler

Offline darlingGrim

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #55 on: January 04, 2015, 04:21:53 AM »
Dang it! I've encountered another problem. I've basically made the beasts nearly unbeatable.
Because the beasts are made of energy they damage the receive from blades doesn't do much. The only thing I can think of is to give the beasts a "core" orb which will disperse them when destroyed. Hmmm, it'll have to do. I think. The core orb can get damaged and make it so that they have trouble gathering more energy from the "source" orb. I'll have to make the "core" orb visible on the beasts probably.

I want to keep the rating Teen. I don't want it crossing over into mature territory. I also don't want it to seem like I treat death flippantly.

Offline MK

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #56 on: January 04, 2015, 04:51:53 AM »
Akame Ga Kill?? You could just hide the core so the character has to guess where it is. If she misses the core then the beast will regenerate which seems alot cooler then having a big target that is really obvious to hit

Offline darlingGrim

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Re: "Enchiridion" Development Thread
« Reply #57 on: January 04, 2015, 05:09:45 AM »
Akame Ga Kill?? You could just hide the core so the character has to guess where it is. If she misses the core then the beast will regenerate which seems alot cooler then having a big target that is really obvious to hit

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I haven't seen Akame Ga Kill. Do they also do a beast/core thing? (google images it*), I don't like the anime style, but the manga style looks good. Also I was not prepared for that gore shot with one of the girls cut in half. I do not like gore  (;A;)
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She's not suppose to kill it though. I haven't really planned on her fighting it. So I guess hidden really is the best route. That way I can bring it up later.