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Topics - Jack Melancholy

Pages: [1]
Comics and other Gallery / Jack's OTHER Drawings
« on: October 04, 2013, 06:47:11 PM »
I'm surprised I haven't gotten in trouble for posting non-manga drawings in my other art thingy. Though I think Hasith said something about that awhile ago. :I Man. I feel kinda dumb for not making this earlier.
Welp. Anyway. This is for my other drawing stuffz.
So here~

MR Pub / Manga Raiders! Fighters of the Forum
« on: May 13, 2013, 05:00:44 PM »
Hello everyone reading. Fleet found a game engine for fighter games like Street Fighter and whatnot. So while I got drawn in by the awesome idea of making my own character an idea popped up in the chat. Toasty joined in as well already. We, Toasty and I, want to know if anyone else is up for the MR fighter game.
The engine is MUGEN. While I have no idea what the f**k to do with it because of my lack of coding knowledge ,Toasty may know though, I'm figuring if I learn how to make a character maybe I can tell you guys or link a video so that you may join in as well.

That block go long. >.>

Anyway. You can go ahead and list somethings that you think would be cool to have in it, Music, Backgrounds, fighters (preferred original), etc. No copy-written things, and only music that the artist(s) says is okay to use.
This will not be for profit, but I don't wanna get sued.

So. If you want to join in, and not just say, "PUT ME IN! PUT IN MY OC!", then PM your skype (depending on if I know you or not) and I'll add you to the small skype group made for this. There we can brainstorm and whatnot.

Special moves, heavy, light, jump attack, etc. are all types of things that could be added to the characters. Just thought I'd mention.

Comics and other Gallery / Jack's random artwork
« on: March 30, 2013, 10:49:18 AM »
Today I decided to make a thread for my art that isn't manga. Such as realism, cartoons, or animations.
If I put an animation up, it's most likely going to just consist of the frame-by-frames in the spoiler tab.
Others will be put in normally.
First thing~:


Sorry it's not animated. Don't know how to upload an animation.

Cafe Nippon / Serious about this! Learn Japanese with each other.
« on: September 28, 2012, 12:41:20 AM »
Hi. Jack here (XD lame opening sentence)

I wanted to start this thread because i'm certain everyone wants to learn Japanese. Yes it's another "Learn Japanese" threads >.>

This is bound to fail like the others but I hope it doesn't do so until a little while.
Not sure if this has been done yet but,
In this thread we all try to help each other learn Japanese. If you find a good website that helped you learn a little bit than link it here. If you found a good way of memorizing on your own tell us. If you have free time. Come here and be sure to practice with us.

If you have skype join us and start trying to speak in Japanese only. If you don't know what the others are saying, ask for help on what they said, but it must still be in Japanese.

This is a 100% thread. If you join and don't give us some kind of update within a month, and are called out about this you must make 100 flash cards with random Japanese phrases and post proof you have made said cards.

If you think there is anything else I might need to add the these rules feel free to say so.

Also, not everything you say must be in Japanese at first. I myself am 100% new to learning Japanese and i'm certain you are too. You can feel free to type in Japanese here though if you'd like.

(When I say Japanese I mean English characters but Japanese words.)

I will be glad to post links for learning Japanese first since I started this thread.


This one is mostly for learning to write Japanese. Not easy!!! http://www.freejapaneselessons.com/
Not the most certain about this one >.> http://www.101languages.net/japanese/

That's all i'm gonna post. Too much links from one guy might be too much >.>
Please help me and the rest of the others who might join learn. ^_^

Collaboration (Art Exchange) / Slenderman Comic Collaboration
« on: August 14, 2012, 09:27:04 PM »

This is a collab I wanted to make after reading about, playing games about, and researching the Slenderman.(couldn't sleep that night :( ) For all those into freaky things please feel free to join in and help out. Only thing I have so far is the basic things you'd get when you Google Slenderman. Along with a plot acceptable to change. It's just basically about the Slenderman, what he does, why he does it, and to add someone who will actually talk, the Slenderman will have a girl with him. Around 7 like the age he is said to most likely take someone. She does not fear him. She thinks of him as a dad since hers is dead and the mom is an alcoholic or something.

What I would like to have for this collab. It's similar to that of what manga dude has.

Chief Editor:
Assistant Editor:

Main Artist:
BG Artist:
Effect Artist:

Main Story Writer:
Assistant Story Writer:

Jack of all trades (someone who can help out with all of it.):

If you're in please inform me which spot you'd like I of course will be the Editor. (Really not going to know all that much to do so might have to depend on the Assistant Editor more.)

I'll also be the ASSISTANT Story Writer. I just enjoy writing so I'm just going to be trying to help out.

All assistant spots have TWO openings. Main spots have ONE. Jack of all trades is limitless. BG Artist has TWO spots and Effect Artist has THREE spots open. Assistant Editor also has TWO spots.

If you are interested in a spot that has reached its maximum, send me a PM which spot and a link to something of yours that will have to do with that spot. I'll review and tell you if i'm willing to make an exception.

When trying to get a spot do as the same as the above for maxed out ones. Feel free to try for multiple spots. However you can only do one job. I don't want anyone to be over working themselves for a project i wanted to do for fun.

For certain people I know as a friend. I wont be making exceptions just because of being a friend. However if I know your skills can get the job done I will take that into account.

Hope that you are willing to work on this a lot if you join. I will be home in my room for the next couple of weeks before school starts up because I really don't have much to do. When my school year starts back up I wont be updating as quickly as normal.

Thank you for bothering to read this all the way through and hope you are interested in this.

Develop Your Story / Dead But Living (title subject to change)
« on: August 11, 2012, 08:36:21 AM »
This is a story I've been working on for about a month or two now and said i wouldn't post it on here until I finished chapter five. Unfortunately I have writers block so I though I shouldn't wait to post it onto the forum. So here it is. The first Four chapters of DBL. Hope you like it. Feedback would be great. Almost forgot. It's written in kind of a script form.

Chapter 1 - Reminiscing.

Jack is walking down the hall and enters his fathers work room.
Jack - Hey dad, can i go with you to see the human world?
GR - Why would you want to do that? The humans are nothing but moraless ingrates that take everything for granted.
Jack - I'm not sure, but i thought it would be interesting to see how they live their lives, or how the deal with things.
GR - Alright, but i promise you this, you will despice the humans after seeing how they really act.
GR walks out of his work room.
GR and Jack walk through a portal and appear in an alley in the middle of a town. They walk out to the edge of the alley. GR looks down at his watch.
GR - 3....2...1...
All of a sudden a car looses control and swerves into the opposite lane. While trying to avoid it car hits another and several cars pile up until traffic comes to a complete stop.
GR - I beleive there is going to be a total of 6 to be collected here.
Souls start to come out of the car wreck and start to drift to GR. GR opens a portal and the souls go through.
Jack - Well that didn't really make me hate humans.
GR - Thats because you think it's just an accident.
GR stops one of the souls.
GR - This is the one that caused it all. He was drunk and swerved into the other lane. Because of this mans ignorance 5 others are dead, two of which were children, and one was a man to be wed this coming sunday.
Jack - Thats one guy. Not everyone is ignorant like this man.
The soul goes through the portal. GR points to a huge crowd forming by the wreck.
GR - All of those people are just standing there doing nothing. Some are recording it on there phones hoping to sell it to the news. A few of them are starting to grin at this.
Jack - Yeah, bu-
GR - Because of these people not helping, i'm taking in 4 souls that could be saved if they hurried. Wait a minute...... There's one missing. Where is it?
A little girls cry can be heard coming from a car that was totalled and flipped over. As the girl is still screaming for help a fire starts to surround the cars.
GR - And my last example of someone who could have been saved from this all; that little girl is going to be burned alive.
GR turns back to Jack. Jack isn't there.
GR - Where'd he go.
Someone in the crowd - Hey, what the hell's that kid doing!?
GR looks to the wreckage. Jack is running through open spaces, climbing over the cars, and running through the flames. Jack gets to the car with the girl in it.
Jack - Are you ok?
The girl is crying to much to answer. Jack reaches in to unbuckle her seat belt and starts to pull her out. She is holding on to a teddy bear that is stuck on a piece of metal that was sticking out of the seat and had barely missed her.
Jack - What are you doing?! Now is not the time to be worried about some teddy bear. If we don't get out of here soon you will die.
After saying this she lets go of the bear and Jack leads her to saftey outside the wreckage.
Girl - T-Thank you... Why did you save me?
Said as she starts to stop crying.
Jack -  Because according to my dad, no one else would have. I'm Jack by the way.
Girl - My name is Maria.
An ambulance and fire truck show up.
Jack - You should go to the ambulance and get checked out.
Maria - Yeah.
Jack starts to walk away.
Maria - I hope I get to see you again and return your kindness.
Jack stops and GR is heading towards them.
Jack - Considering who I am.... I doubt that. But if you want to repay my kindness, then live life as a decent person. No need for you to turn into another worthless human.
GR - Jack! What the hell were you thinking!
GR leans in to talk to him privately.
GR - You aren't supposed to stop someone from dying. Your a reaper for crying out loud.
Jack - Well if i didn't save her no one else would have.
Jack storms off and heads through the portal in the alley where they entered.
There is a celebration going on. Today is Jacks birthday.
Crowd - Happy birthday Jack!
Jack blows out the candles.
It is now showing things that went on at his party.
The party is ending and everyone is leaving. Jack starts to head upstairs.
GR - Jack?
Jack stops and turns around.
Jack - What?
GR - I know you're still upset at me for saying that you should have let that girl in the accident be as she was, and i'm sorry.
Jack - Is that all?
GR - No.
GR holds his hand out and hands Jack a Pocket watch.
GR - Here.
Jack - I don't use pocket watches.
GR - You'll use this one. It has several properties to it aside from telling time. The one i'm certain you will be glad it has is that it allows you to look into the human world. It also has a counter part locket that can be used as a communications device.
Jack - And where is that one?
GR - I gave it to the girl you saved.
Jack smiles a little.
GR - So, do you except my appology?
Jack - Yeah.
Jack hugs his dad. Then heads to his room.
Jack - Lets see how she is doing since then.
Jack opens the pocket watch and sees an orphanage. Maria is playing in the yard of the orphanage.
Jack - What the hell?
Jack pushes the button on top of the watch. Marias locket starts to glow, and Maria opens it.
Maria - JACK!
Jack - Hi Maria.
Maria - When i was told by that weird tall guy that i could talk to you with this thing, I thought he was crazy. *giggles*
Jack - That aside. Why are you at an orphanage?
Maria starts to look sad and upset.
Maria - I... I don't want to talk about it.
Jack - Are you OK?
Maria - Yeah i'm fine.
Maria smiles.
Maria - Can you come over and play?
Jack - I'm not so sure I ca-
Maria - PLEASE?
Jack - I'll have to ask my parents.
Maria - Yay! Jack's coming over to play.
Jack - I didn't say-
Maria closed the locket (thus hanging up). Jack goes to find his dad and asks him if he may go to see maria.
GR - I got yelled at last time by your mother for taking you without her permission, so ask her.
Jack finds his mother.
Jack - Mom, can I go visit a friend?
Mom - Sure. Just make sure you check in.
Jack - Uhh.. OK.
Jack - (What the hell? Why is she so....... Not herself? Usually she asks me 20 questions about everything before i get a straight forward answer.)
Jack - Thanks.
Jack starts to walk back to his dad and his mother is waving as they leave.
(Jack was daydreaming the entire time and appears to look like a human)
Maria - Jack!..... Hey, Jack?!
Maria gets a devious smile. While Jack is spaced out Maria grabs a marker and draws a moustache on his face. After this she shakes jack violently. Jack wakes up kind of freaked out.
Jack - Huh? What? Where?....
Jack has a bit of an annoyed face.
Maria - Wakey wakey Jacky. *giggles*
Jack - I've told you before, it's Jack not Jacky.
Maria - Yeah but jacky sounds sounds better. *giggles*
A couple of girls walk by and giggle.
Jack - What's everyone laughing about?
Maria - Nothing. *giggles*
Jack just stands there and looks at her for a second. More people laugh.
Jack - Y- you didn't..... Did you?
Maria - What?
Jack looks at his phone and sees his reflection.
Jack - Why do you insist on drawing on my face every single time you see me sleeping.
Maria starts cracking up laughing.
Maria - B- because it looks funny on people, but it looks hysterical on you.
Jack wipes the marker from his face.
Jack - Lets just get back home before it gets to dark.
Maria - Awwww. I wanted to stop at the comic book shop before we went home.
Jack - Sorry, but we aren't going.
Maria - Please?
Jack - No.
Maria - We're going.
Jack gets an annoyed face again.
Jack - Fine. I wanted to get something to drink anyway.
Maria - Woohoo.
Maria starts to laugh.
Jack - What is it now? You didn't draw somethinsg else on me that i missed, did you?
Maria - No.
Jack - Than why are you laughing?
Maria - You said you wanted to get something to drink, but you're a skeleton.
Jack puts his hand over Marias mouth.
Jack - Shhhhh. Others aren't supposed to know who or what I really am.
Maria - Yeah yeah. Lets go already.
Maria grabs jack and drags him by the arm.
Jack - I can walk you know.
Maria - I know, but this is more fun. Mostly because you're the only guy i can drag around because you're nothing but bones.
Jack - I said shut up about that.
Maria islooking through the shelves and Jack is drinking his soda.
Jack - C'mon. This is taking way to long.
Maria - Well i cant find it.
Jack - What you looking for anyway?
Maria - They sell DVD's here and I heard they got my favorite one. I can't seem to find it anywhere else in town.
Jack - I know you're looking for a DVD. I meant which one?
Maria - "Nightmare Before Christmans"
Jack has a bit of a shocked face.
Jack - It's not Halloween, nor Christmas so why the hell would this store, scratch that. Why would any store have a movie like that at this time in the year.
Maria - FOUND IT!
The yell startled jack and falls back.
Jack - ........shut up....
Maria sticks out her tounge.
Maria - You started it.
Jack - Actually, you started it by yelling, "I FOUND IT".
Maria - Nuh Uh.
Jack - Whatever. Lets just get back home. You know bad stuffs been going on at night lately.
Maria - Yeah yeah. I don't have to worry.
Jack - What do you mean you don't have to worry. A serial killer is going around.
Maria - I mean I don't have to worry, because I have the son of the grim reaper as my eternal servent.
Maria gives a smile and laughs a little.
Jack - Guess you have a point there.
Jack drops his head in regret.
Jack - You're going to exploit that fact aren't you?
Maria - What ever do you mean?
Jack - You know damn well what I mea-
Maria cuts him off abd starts to giggle.
Jack - Whats so funny now?
Maria - It's nothing. Nothing at all.
It shows jack with a small mouse on his head.
Jack - Thats a lie and you know it. Now tell me what the hell is so funny.
Maria - Are you sure you want to know?
Jack - Yes.
Maria - A mouse. A mouse is on your head.
Jacks eyes widen in shock.
Jack - Please be joking.
Maria - Nope.
Jack starts throw his hands to try to get the mouse off and shaking his head.
Jack - Get it off! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, GET IT OFF!!!
Maria starts rolling on the ground laughing.
Jack - What the hell are you doing. Help get this thing off my freaking head!
Maria - What thing? *laughing*
Jack - The damned mou-
Jack stops completely.
Jack - There is no mouse is there?
Maria is still laughing on the floor.
Jack - You.....Why do.......What......WHY DO YOU KEEP MESSING WITH ME!!
He yells this as he starts to pull on his hair.
Maria - C'mon. If it makes you feel better, I'll let you get me back whenever you want.
Jack - By get you back you mean-
Maria - You get to prank me, duh. Jeeze. You are seriously starting to make me wonder how you're the one who smart enough to skip the next 2 grades. That is if you were enrolled in school here or anywhere for that matter.
Jack - Well education programs are a lot more...... Forced to be crammed into your head. They make sure you never forget a thing in the underworld.
Maria - The underworld. I wonder what it's like there.
Jack - Well it's like here except it has demons, more poisoness plants, and only about three trees actually manage to survive down there.
Maria's eyes widen.
Maria - I wanna go. I wanna go.
Jack - Sorry no humans can enter the under world unless they're dead, or have a actually reason for being there.
Maria - Like what?
Jack - Well like, making a deal with my dad, becoming a demons servent, or marage of someone who lives there.
Maria - Are those the only option?
Jack - Aside death. In which case you are only there for a little while until you are told if you're going to heaven or hell.
Maria - I thought the underworld was hell.
Jack - Its complicated to explain.
Before Maria could ask anything else a loud scream coming from a woman in an alley interupts.
Jack - What the hell? What was that?
Jack and Maria rush to the alley where they find a woman had been pushed down and is being harassed by a couple of guys.
Jack - Hey what the hell are you doing?!
T1 - Huh? Who the hell are you? Look kid, you should just get going.
T2 - Yeah you little punk. You should just go before we decide to mess you up.
Jack - You-
Maria - Who the hell do you think you are? Talking to Jack like your better than him. I bet he would kill you before you could even lay a hand on him.!
Jack - What the hell are you doing, Maria?
T1 - What was that? You think that tooth pick little bastard could do anything to us. Hahaha, I think i'm gonna die just from laughing.
T2 - Yeah. And what's with this girl? Who does she think she is? Trying to scare us by saying her boyfriend could kill us.
T3 - What a stupid bitch.
All three of the men start laughing. Jacks eyes start to gain an angry look as they were laughing.
Jack - I'm going to *censored*ing kill you for saying that.
T3 - Huh? What was that.
T1 - Did he say he was going to kill us.
The three start to laugh again. Jack holds out his hand and a black specs start to come together and form a scythe. One of the guys notices this.
T1 - What the hell?
The others turn and see he now has a scythe.
T2 - Where did that come from.
Before any more questions could be asked, Jack takes off running towards them. One of them reaches into there pocket and pulls out a gun. He fires several shots and finally hits Jack in the chest. Jack stops.
T3 - That little *censored*er wasn't so tough. Huh?
Jack is starting to run towards them again.
T3 - What the hell?
The thug starts to fire again and hits Jack with every other shot until he emptied the clip.
T2 - The hell is this guy!
The thug is trying to grab another clip and reload. Jack is already to close to him as he had put the clip into the gun. Jack slices the guys head off. The others start to freak the hell out.
T1 - Lets get the hell out of here!
Before they could run jack had ran up and kneed one of them in the stomach and stabbed the bottom of his scythe through his neck.
T2 - Oh God!
The last one drops to his knees and begs for his life.
T2 - Please! I'm Sorry. I'll do anything, just let me go.
Jack - Anything?
Jack slices off the mans hands. The thug screams in pain.
Jack - You will live, but from here on out, you are to live your life being as kind as the laws allow. If I ever see you doing anything like this again...... I'll force hooks down your throat and pull out whatever they catch.
Jack then knocks the man out and bandages up his stubs. Jack walks to the lady.
Jack - I'm Terriblly sorry for what has happened to you.
Jack proceeds and walks back to Maria.
Maria - What in the world was that!
Jack - S-sorry. I didn't mean to scare you or anything, but that tends to happen when i get angry.
Maria says as her eyes start to water.
Jack - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I honestly never wanted you to see me when I get angry like that.
Maria - You're so mean. Tha poor man now has to fear for his life everyday, and he has no hands so he is likely to never get a good job.
Jack gets an annoyed expression on his face.
Jack - You're way to kind for this world.
Maria - Go back to that man and appologize.
Jack - Two thing i want to say. First thing that guy is unconcious, so I can't appologize to him. The second thing, Why are you freaking out bout the guy with no hands when i just killed the other two? =_=
Maria - Because they can go where they belong now, but that man has to live life handicapped and paranoid.
Jack - Could we finish this at home. That lady is starting to stare at us.
Maria yawns and enters the kitchen. Jack is in the living  room.
Jack - Morning, Maria.
Maria - Hi, Jack. I still can't get used to the fact that you have no need to sleep.
Jack - Just because I have no need for it doesn't mean I don't.
Maria comes into the living, sits down on the couch, and leans against jack.
Jack - What are you doing?
Maria - I'm still kinda tired. *yawns*
Jack - I'm a servent. Not a pillow. And for the love of god, stop going around in just your underwear!
Maria - But its so much more comfortable.
Jack - (How did I end up like this again?)
Jack looks down at Maria.
Jack - (Oh yeah. That day it happened. That terrible terrible day.)
(Back when Jack and Maria were around 13)
Jack is playing a game. (It looks like chess but has two rotating disc on the side with blue orbs hovering above them)
Jack - This is getting boring.
Jack gets up and walks to his bed.
Jack - Man, today is so boring. *sigh* I wonder if Maria is outof school yet.
Jack grabs the watch from his pocket and opens it. When he sees whats going on he drops the watch. The watch is showing maria is being held down by two guys and a few other guys are gathering in a cirle. Jack runs out his room and breaks a wooden cabinet the holds GR's scythe and takes it. GR hears this and rushes to Jack. Before he could get to him, Jack had already opened a portal and went through it.
GR - He should be able to do that at his age.
GR walks through the portal. (Switches back to Jacks p.o.w.) Jack arrives through the portal and sees what was going on and gets angry. (GR's p.o.w.) GR walks through the portal minutes after Jack. GR sees all the boys that were there when Jack arrived, had been killed most horrifically and jack is by Maria.
GR - What the hell have you done, Jack!
Jack - ....
Jack is still trying to comfort Maria.
GR - I'm sorry, Jack, but if you are going to be like this because of her. Than you are no longer aloud to-
Jack - I'm not leaving.
GR - You are leaving and you are doing so now.
Jack shows a mark on neck. It looks like a triangle. GR is shocked.
GR - You.. How did you learn about that spell.
Jack - I found a book with it in there. I was hoping to learn how to control my reaper abilities.
GR - Do you even know what you've done? You've just entered an unbreakable contract with this girl and are now her eternal servent! How do you think I am supposed to explain this to your mother! Because of you, I have to fear something worse than myself!
GR starts to head to the portal.
GR - Come on. We have to discuss with your mother about what you've done.
Jack - I'm not leaving her here.
GR - *sigh* You know i cant take her with.
Jack sits there.
GR - Fine. I'll go and talk to your mother alone.
GR walks through the potal.
Jack - (After a while he finally came back and said that my mother will allow for me to stay, but I would have to check in with her 3 times a week. Because of me using that spell I have become bound to Maria as her servent for eternity. I'm just wondering how she has never once been freaked out about the things i do. I brutally murdered 6 people right in front of her.)
Maria fidgets a little.
Jack - You know you have work in about half an hour, so could you please wake up and put some close on.
Maria - Day off.
Jack - Then Why the hell did you wake up so early?
Maria - Alarm clock went off, so I got up, but I'm still tired.
Jack - (I really don't know if I can go all of eternity having to deal with her weird logic)
Jack looks down.
Jack - (I really hope she doesn't drool on my hoodie like last time.)

- END-

I'll be putting the other one up later. I just don't want to flood this topic with all four chapters at once. It would make you guys think it's too much to read at once.

break Room / Blinded Demon Eel Sculpture
« on: May 09, 2012, 05:35:07 PM »
Hello I thought it would be nice to give away a sculpture I made a little while back. It is a 100% made up creature I call the Blinded Demon Eel. It is small and can be used as either a paper weight or an ornament.

Sorry for the picture quality, all I have is a web camera. Anyway, this prize will be given to whomever illustrates DeadBraker Characters the best. Here is a link to the basic ideas for them:http://forums.mangaraiders.com/index.php/topic,6126.0.html
Only one that does not have a pre-drawn Picture is Yuu.

So just to recap best illustrations of DeadBraker Characters wins the Blinded Eel sculpture.

Can't wait to see your drawings. Good Luck. :thumbsup:
deadline was the 31st of march, 2012

Manga Art Gallery / Jacks Drawings
« on: May 08, 2012, 10:38:17 PM »
Sorry some of these are so bad. They are just first attempts of DeadBraker Characters

DeadBraker Possibility

Touma possibility

Sorry No Yuu Yet, I'm not to good at drawing girls. If any of you would like to try Yuu has long, dark hair, is around 15, and where glasses. Feel free to try and draw her. I already know I can't.
P.S. Drawing people only off a description could be good practice.

Develop Your Story / The Dream Reaper
« on: May 08, 2012, 01:09:26 AM »
Hello according to nobodieshome I am allowed to take over his story and start it as if it were my own.
I am giving credit where credit is due, NobodiesHome is the original creator for the idea of this story but he stop working on it after a while. So now after gaining his permission I will be writing The Dream Reaper story along with my own original story DeadBraker. Hope you enjoy and that this story comes out somewhat good enough to the original creators liking.

So I will try my best to make this story as good as I can.
For those who are curious about some names of people,  places, and things, they are Latin. If you are interested in finding out what they mean in English look it up in Google translate.

Nataro is 13 years old. He is very hyper but easily discomforted and gets scared kind of easy.
Brown hair, Green eyes, and is in middle school. Has no current love interest but could change.
Is prone to misfortune when it comes to things like a plan that could backfire and ruin itself.

(Would Like To thank StoryTeller For Writing Out The Car Scene, In My Opinion He Is An Official Co-Writer And Will Be Allowed To Post His Own Chapters He Would Like.)

 Script:(Under Reconstruction At The Moment)

Nataro and his family are in their car happily singing along to a song on the radio. The road was almost empty. They stop singing to the song and Nataro begins to laugh, filled with joy.
       Nataro: This is amazing! There's no one in the road!
       Dad: It was a great idea to come to the amusement park on a schoolday. We probably won't even need to wait to enjoy the rides!
       Mom: But remember what you promised, Nataro. You have to study what you missed in today's class.
       Nataro: It's ok mom, it's only once a year we can do this after all.
       Dad: We can only afford this once a year. Food int he park is quite expensive.
       Nataro: It's ok as long as we have fun though!
       Mom: Exactly! So, Nataro, Which ride do you want to go first?
       Nataro: I was thinking on going on the Destructinator! It's the fastest, maddest coaster around!
       Dad: Guhhh... I'm getting sick already!
They all begin to laugh, another known song plays on the radio and they begin to sing again. Nataro stops singing and couldn't help but smile.
       Nataro: This day is going to be perfect!
His dad turns back and pats Nataro on the head. A car out of control came zig-zagging in the opposite way.
       Nataro: Dad watch out!
His father turns around, grabs the steering wheels as hard as he can and turns the car.
       Dad: Oh, Sh-
They crash and their is sent spinning to the side of the road, the other car carried on. After the ambulance gets to the crash they see that Nataro's parents are fine and have pulled their unconscious son out of the wreckage, they both are crying.

Mom, "Nataro!!....Nataro, please!!!....
The medic puts Nataro into the ambulance and takes him to the hospital.......
In utter darkness Nataro hears a voice, one that is unfamiliar to him.

Voice, "Follow....Follow me young Somnio Rex....  You must Find me and protect the lighthouses that guide dreams from the nightmares traps....Awaken Now!

Nataro wakes up in a cold sweat. He is in a bizarre looking jungle.
He yells hoping to attract attention
Nataro, "Hello?! Is anyone there?!

Voice, "This way Somnio....(Voice fades and echoes)

Nataro, "W-who's there?!"
Nataro looks around trying to find the source of the voice

Voice, "Hello Somnio Rex. I am Dormientes Monachus. One of the Dream Wavers, the guardian of the LightHouse Dreams.  I request your presence immediately. Just head toward the mountains until you reach my sanctuary."

Nataro, "Where am I, and why do you need to see me?"
Nataro is still looking around for the man speaking to him.

Dormientes, "You are in a world of my own creation, one that harbors only the good of dreams. You are needed to help save this world and many others."

Nataro looks up and yells
Nataro, "Why, am I the one who has to do this! Something like this is to much for one 13 year old kid! And why do I have to do anything you say, Huh?!"

Dormientes appears behind.
Dormientes, "You know, I never got why those of the real world look up when talking to a shapeless voices. Not one bit."

Nataro is shocked (not literally)
Nataro, "W-who are you? Where did you come from?

Dormientes, "I already told you who I am, and I came through those bushes.
He walks to a near by stump and has a seat.
Now young Somnio, "Why do you have to do anything" you ask. Well it is simple, you are one of 5 people who have an active Triple Helix DNA Strand. It skips over a couple hundred thousand generations before one finally successfully obtains this trait. Lucky that you were one of those 1/100,000,000"

Nataro starts to walk away.

Dormientes, "H-hey, where are you going?"

Nataro, "To look for help. We are lost in the woods and you are obviously delusional."

Nataro walks through a bush. He sees Dormientes.
Dormientes, "Back so soon? Where is that help you were talking about?"

Nataro has a very confused look upon himself. :confused:
Nataro, "H-how? When?

Dormientes, "Please, have a seat."
Dormientes points to a chair across from him.

Nataro, "Alright, I am starting to believe you may not be just a delusional old man."

Dormientes gives of a little chuckle.
Dormientes, "Seems like you could use something to drink. Here have some."
Dormientes hands Nataro a cup of tea, and smiles. Nataro takes a sip, and spits it out immediately.

Nataro, "What was that."

Dormientes, "Tea. Why, did you not like it?"

Nataro, "It tasted just like sour melon juice."

Dormientes, "Really? How strange. Maybe Somnio's taste buds are..."
Nataro cuts him off.

Nataro, "Come on do not act Innocent! You made the tea! And what is with the whole "Somnio" thing. My name is Nataro, not Somnio.

Dormientes, "You are right I did make the tea, however your name, your Weavers name is Somnio M. Rex.

Nataro, "What do you mean my Weaver name?"

Dormientes, "You are a Dimidium Dream Weaver. Only those with usable Triple Helix DNA Strand Can be Dimidium Dream Weaver."

Nataro, "What the hell is a Dimidium Dream Weaver?"

Dormientes, "Someone who is able to Weave together things in the dream world."

Nataro, "You mean like a lucid dreamer?"

Dormientes, "Not exactly. You see a lucid dreamer can control their dream, but they can only effect the dreams.
A Dream Weaver is able to control their dream to the point they can effect theirs or someone else's Physical form."

Nataro, "You know you just keep making it harder and harder to believe a word you say."
Said as he takes a bite out of a burger that Dormientes hands him.
Nataro, "Besides, even if I were Weaver or whatever you call them. Why have I only just now learned of this?"

Dormientes, "Simple. The THDS (Triple Helix DNA Strand) would not have been active unless you are put into a Heavy slumber or as modern people say, a coma."

Nataro, "Fine, But I have never Been put in a coma."

Dormientes, "You are wrong. You are in one right now. Remember your short search for rescue, the odd tasting tea, Or maybe the table where you have set your burger. Where that burger come from, Huh?"

Nataro has a shocked face.
Nataro, "So you mean I-I'm in a coma."

Dormientes is playing chess now.
Dormientes, "Afraid so."

Nataro, "H-how do I leave?! Do I have to die."

Dormientes, "Dear God, No. If a normal person were to do that it would they would wake up in a flash. But you are a Weaver and if a Weaver dies in the dream world they die in reality as well."

Nataro, "S-so I can't get back?"
Nataro starts to cry. Dormientes gets up and goes to Nataro.

Dormientes, "Here. This is a device known as the manu textorum. It is for Dimidium Weavers only. Normal humans cannot use or even see this device. It will allow you to access the Somnium Mundi, it will also allow you to leave."

After Nataro receives the man textorum he wipes the tears from his eyes.
Nataro, "Thank you."

Dormientes, "Now. The trouble in which I wanted to talk to you about. There is a Dream Reaper among the Somnium Mundi. His whereabouts are unknown. He plans to destroy all the guardian lighthouses and replacing them with nightmare pillars."

Nataro, "So what? People will get nightmares, they will get used to it eventually."

Dormientes, "Like I said earlier, Weavers can effect people in reality. Meaning if they get attacked or killed in their dreams because of the Dream Reapers nightmare pillars they could possibly die and all of humanity could be wiped out just from sleeping."

Nataro is stunned silent.

Nataro, "Y-you can't be serious. Right?"

Dormientes, "I'm afraid i very much am. You are one of the few people who can stop this threat to the people of your world. Do you except this responsibility or do you want to leave here?

Nataro drops to the ground and starts to cry.
Nataro, "I....I...I don't want to die but I don't want to abandon my world to the destruction of the Dream Reapers nightmare pillar."

Dormientes reaches out his hand.
Dormientes, "So then don't die and don't let Dream Reaper, stop him and survive."

Nataro looks up and takes his hand. Nataro stands up and wipes his tears.
Nataro, "I-i will. I will stop him and save this and my world."
Nataro starts to walk off.

Dormientes, "umm... Where are you going? You don't even know the basics of this world or any other."

Nataro stops and turns back.
Nataro, "I guess you're right. I don't even know how I got here. Is there a way to get back?"

Dormientes, "Well of course there is silly boy, but take this before I tell you.
Dormientes had Nataro hands him a strange music box.

Nataro, "What is this?"

Dormientes, "It is a special music box. Play this whenever you go to sleep, the special melody will allow you to drift into this world without problems. All you do is wind it and let it play."
Dormientes walks to a wide open area. He puts his hands up. A green portal rises.
Dormientes, "Use this portal it will send a serious shock to the body like when you hit the scariest part of a nightmare and will wake you up...... Ironic isn't it?"

Nataro walks to the portal.
Nataro, "I'll come back soon. I just don't want my parents to worry about me to much."

Dormientes, "I understand. Don't take to long though. In your world it will be 6 hours, but here it will be like 2 days.

Nataro, "I'll return as soon as I can."
Nataro walks through the portal.

                                                         THE DREAM REAPER
                                                            END CHAPTER 1

                         Any suggestions on changes or ideas about this please feel free to post.

Welcome Center / It's DeadBraker.|.rekarBdaeD s'tI
« on: May 07, 2012, 01:49:01 AM »
Hello Jack Melancholy here my real name is christian bjork,

I am a bit of an artist and a writer and wish to become a jack of all trades and master of none.
I love manga and anime.
I'm 15.
My favorite manga is rurouni kenshin. Favorite anime is Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann.
I found this place on Google, all hail Google!
I have few hobbies but most of them are a bit weird such as I like to make contraptions that do cool stuff like a giant hand extender (mechanical hand).
And last of all I am a Ninja :ninja:, but keep it a secret. *Shhhh*

Develop Your Story / DeadBraker Manga Storyline
« on: May 04, 2012, 10:24:56 PM »
Title: DeadBraker
Chapter: 1

Basic Concept:
Protagonist (Touma Harumasa) has a split personality (DeadBraker(DB)) and knows about it. When his other self takes control his attitude changes, his eyes turn from blue to green, and he grows a tail (don't ask why. it stays hidden most of the time.). The other self likes to fight and usually tends to go to a fight club at night. When the original protagonist goes to sleep is when the other takes control of the body or if the original allows it. The original tries to live a normal life and hides his personality disorder from everybody (even his parents). The other tends to be a bit on the crazy side when pissed off or gets a good fight. The original either talks to him in his head, a mirror, as a hallucination, or in his dreams.

Script for the manga:

Touma is at school and talking to friends. When they finish talking Touma goes up to girl he likes and asks her out. To his amazement she says yes. After this he goes to the bathroom locks the door and starts to yell to himself.

Touma: "What did I just do?! Why did I suddenly ask her out?"
Touma hears a voice laughing. He turns and there is DB.

Touma yells: "Don't tell me I did this because of you."

DB, "I thought that you liked this girl."

Touma, "I do but I can't talk to as if she is just another run of the mill person'"

DB, "Why? I mean she is just a girl. Why do you even like her in the first place?"

Touma, "Because she is the only girl I have ever met that show even the slightest bit of kindness toward me. When we were in Elementary school she would always sit by me at recess because I was to scared to play with anyone and they all thought I was weird. And in middle school she would talk to me when everyone else thought there was something wrong with me, and she would laugh at all my jokes even when they weren't funny. She is the only girl I have met that can make me nervous just by sitting in the same room."

DB, "Wow, you sound love struck. Tell you what Touma if you get to nervous or feel like you're going to mess things up just let me take over."

Touma, "Like hell I would ever do that. We agreed that you can roam while I'm asleep."

DB, "But the way you're freaking out this seems like an emergency, right?"

Touma, "It is but... I.... Arggghhh, fine, but only if things get to bad."

DB, "Awesome, I finally get to go out during the day."
DB has a funny expression on his face from the excitement.

Touma, " But you need to stop acting all macho and act little bit more like me not you."

DB, "Ehh... Why?"

Touma, "Because I don't want her wondering why I'm acting completely opposite of my usual self."

DB, "Fine, fine. Just make sure I get to go out during the day."

Passer By, "Hey!! Open the door. I really need to go!"

Touma opens the door and apologizes. (Skipping Ahead) After school Touma goes home, heads upstairs, and goes to bed. He starts to transform into DB. His eyes open.

DB, "About time, I was getting bored doing nothing all day."
DB starts running down an alley and yells,
DB yells, "Finally, I've better waiting all day for this!"

He Appears at a dirty looking building in a bad looking neighbor hood. He knocks on the door. A Big man (Mr.G) answers,

Mr.G "Who the hell is it?!"

DB kicks in the door and says "It's me?"

Mr.G, "D-DB. I-I'm sorry I D-didn't know it was you."
as he is on his knees bowing.

DB, "Well then look before you yell at your guest." said with a grin on his face.

DB, "So who is the unlucky punk I get to kick the crap out of tonight."

Mr.G, "The american over there." as he points across the room.

The American (Toby) is talking to some girls. DB walks up.
DB, "Hey?

Toby, "Who are you?"

DB, "DeadBraker."

Toby, "So what do you want, I'm busy."

DB, "I'm the guy you're fighting tonight."

Toby, "Haha, if that's the case than you should probably quit while you can pipsqueak."

DB, " Well lets see if you can back up your "I'm better than you" attitude." as he points to a crowd of people in a circle.

(Skip Ahead) DB is getting beat down by Toby. Toby, "Guess you were all talk than, huh?" Toby kicks him in the stomach. Db coughs up blood. Toby, "You're pathetic. I could have beaten you with no arms." Mr.G, "Hey! You should not have said that!" Screaming over the crowd.

Toby, "And why is that?!"

DB appears and decks him in the face, and before he could go flying, DB grabs his arms and breaks them.

DB, "Come on tough guy lets see you fight with no arms. Haha!"
DB kicks him and laughs again. Then a crowd member comes out of nowhere and hits DB in the head with a bottle.

Crowd Member, "Boss, are you alright?"

DB gets behind him. He turns and DB punches him as hard as possible. He goes across the room and get slammed into the wall. In fear Toby starts to cry.

Toby, " Please, I'm begging you. Don't hurt me anymore, I give up you win."

DB turns and walks away, and as his back is turn Toby Pulls out a knife with his barely usable arms and attacks him. DB dodges and elbows him in the stomach. Toby drops and passes out. DB walks away.

DB, "Hey, Mr.G, just send the money to the usual place."

Mr.G, "Got it."
DB leaves.

Mr.G, "Man that kid Scares the hell out of me."
After leaving a strange Person in a hoodie walks into the bar and talks to Mr.g.

Hooded Person, "Tell me, where can I find this DeadBraker fellow everyone is talking about?

Mr.G, "Sorry man you just missed him.
The Hooded man just walks away and leaves the bar.

Back at home DB goes to sleep.
(Skipping Ahead) Touma wakes up and goes to the mirror. He sees his reflection and freaks out.

Touma, "W-what happened to my face?!"

DB shows up. DB, "What, what's wrong?!" with a freaking out expression on his face.

Touma, "My face, it's all messed up......" Touma's faces DB.
"What the hell did you do to my face?!?!?!"

DB, "I-It's not that bad Touma,."

Touma, "Like hell it isn't!"

DB, "Why are you freaking out about this anyway. It's  not news to you or anything, right?"

Touma, "You don't remember do you?"

DB. "......." As he has a puzzled look on his face.

Touma, "That date you set me up with is today."
Touma starts to cry.

DB, "Don't worry, I thought about this I know just how to take care of this.

                                                        END CHAPTER 1

                          Please respond and leave any ideas you have for changes

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