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Author Topic: Rock Star! (Shonen Story)  (Read 2865 times)

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Offline Synctual

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Rock Star! (Shonen Story)
« on: August 03, 2016, 07:44:23 AM »
Been developing this story for a long time. I'm kinda addicted to it too, can't go a day without thinking about it which I think is a good sign. Had this over on the Develop Your Story Board for a year now, so it's been about 2 years since I started working on this. But enough talk outta me, read the story! The first chapter is kinda long, but this is a shonen story so it's to be expected.

Title: Rock Star!
Genres: Shonen, Fantasy, Action, Adventure, Comedy, Drama

Synopsis: Tobi is an adventurer, someone who as their name implies, goes on adventures. But he is also a weird monster known as a Golem. Dreaming of finding the Eternity Star, a magical star that will grant one wish to those who find it, he sets out on an adventure and soon forms a party named 'Rock Star'. Tobi and his ragtag team of adventurers chase after the star together on a long and perilous adventure!


Many tales tell of a magical star that lies hidden on Earth. A celestial body said to grant a wish to anyone who finds it. It has been named the Eternity Star!


(The scene is focused on a young man sleeping on top of a moving train. The young man is named Tobi. Tobi is wearing a sleeveless, purple hoodie unzipped; exposing his front torso, purple ankle-length pants, and black sandals. He has short and spiky, bright purple hair, and purple eyes. Tobi stands 5 feet and 10 inches tall, has a muscular build, sports a clear crystal necklace, and has a tattoo of an 'outlined shield with a wolf's head inside of the shield' on his chest. The train comes to a stop at a train station with a sign that names it 'Alto Town Train Station', waking Tobi up.)

Conductor- Last stop, Alto Town! (People began exiting the train)
Tobi- (Stands up and yawns) Great, now I gotta take a leak.
Conductor- (Nervously) Um, sir can you please get off of the train?
(Tobi jumps off of the train and lands in front of the conductor. He looks at the conductor with what seems like feral eyes.)
Conductor- (Nervous and Frightened; Sweating and Quivering) I-I'm sorry! Please don't hurt me!
Tobi- (Confused) What the hell is your problem? I just wanna know where I can find a place to use the bathroom.
Conductor- T-There's a diner j-just down the road and on your first right sir.
Tobi- Oh, thanks man. (Tobi pats the conductor on the head.) Good boy. (Tobi then walked off, following the conductor's directions.)

(This scene is focused on a young woman that is working in a diner. The diner is called the "Three Ducks Diner" as the sign outside suggests. The diner is filled with customers despite it's small size. The young woman working is named Kaya. Kaya is wearing a short-sleeved white shirt with the word "DUCK" on it, a blue skirt, and white dress sandals. She has shoulder length light blue hair, tied back into a ponytail, and blue eyes. Kaya also stands 5 feet and 8 inches tall. She sports a blue and orange bracelet on her left arm and is holding a tray full of food in her right hand.)

Man 1- Can I get some more ramen over here!?
Man 2- I'd like 3 bottles of sake!
Man 3- Hey Kaya! How about some steak!
Kaya- Sure thing everyone! We'll have it ready in no time. (smiles)

(A heavyset bald man wearing a white t-shirt, apron, brown pants, and black boots walked up behind Kaya with a bowl of ramen in his hand. His name is Mr. Hans. A boy named Jin is sitting on a stool at the bar. He is wearing a white t-shirt with a duck on it, blue shorts, and blue sneakers. He also has short and messy dark brown hair, and brown eyes.)

Mr. Hans- Business sure has been booming ever since you decided to work here Kaya. Here you go Jin. (Gives Jin the bowl of ramen.)
Kaya- It's because I'm such a good waitress. (smiles)
Jin- Really? All the guys say you're good to look at.
Kaya- Haha, That too.
Mr. Hans- With all of these customers you're bringing in, I'll be able to do some renovating in no time.
Kaya- That also means only a few more paychecks and I can finally go after the Eternity Star.
Man 3- Still going on about that star, huh? Hahaha! You think someone would have found it by now if it actually exists.
Man 1- Hell, I wouldn't mind finding that thing myself. Haha!
Jin- What's the Eternity Star?
Kaya- It's a magical star that grants one wish to those who finds it. It's really hard to find and is said to be the most beautiful thing in the world. And I'm going to find it so I can add a picture of it into my Life Scrapbook!
Jin- Your Life Scrapbook? You mean that big book you always carry around with you?
Kaya- Yep, it's my most prized possession and it's going to be full of all kinds of pictures one day!
Jin- Can I be in it!? I wanna be in it!
Kaya- Haha, you already are. Don't worry, I'll have a picture for everyone important to me in here. (smiles)
Mr. Hans- You better have me in there too then! Hahaha!
Kaya- Of course, You guys are family. (Looks up at clock.) 5 already? Well, looks like my shift is up. I'll be in the restroom like usual. (Walks away)

(A slim man wearing a red bandanna, black t-shirt, baggy brown pants, and dark brown shoes walks up towards the counter of the bar. He snatches Mr. Hans' wallet and dashes for the exit.)
Jin- HEY! That guy stole Mr. Hans' wallet!!
Mr. Hans- Someone stop that thief!
Tobi- (Tobi bursts through the diner's doors.) I GOTTA PEE!!!
Thief- (Trying to stop himself.) What the...?!

(The thief is interrupted when Tobi runs right into him knocking him down, but Tobi continues running until he reaches the bar counter.)

Tobi- Is there a bathroom in this place?!
Mr. Hans- (surprised and confused) Uh, yeah. It's on your right and in the back.
Tobi- Thanks! (Tobi dashes into the restroom)
Man 1- The kid knocked the guy out cold.
Man 2- Well, he was running pretty fast.

(Kaya is just stepping into the shower wearing a towel. Tobi bolts past her and enters a stall)
Kaya- (surprised) Huh?!
Tobi- (From inside the stall) Awwwww. (Tobi exits the stall and stands in front of Kaya) Shahaha! I almost wet myself. That would have been embarrassing. (Tobi and Kaya share a brief moment of silence as Tobi looks at her.) Yo, I didn't see you there.

{Note: Tobi often uses "yo" instead of "hey" or "hi".}

(Tobi is sitting on a stool at the bar alongside Jin. He has comical bruises all over his face. Kaya is now fully clothed and is standing behind the bar next to Mr. Hans. Tobi is eating a plate full of what seems to be hand sized pies.)

Tobi- Man, these things are great! What are they?
Mr. Hans- Tobi, is it? Haven't you eaten a meat pie before? They're the town's specialty.
Tobi- This is the first I've heard of them. They're awesome!
Kaya- (angrily) Why should he be getting free food after what he did?! He's clearly a crazy pervert!
Man 3- Hahaha! What a lucky kid! Hey, what did she look like kiddo?
Tobi- I don't know, the same as she does now I guess.
Kaya- (furiously) Don't answer him you idiot!!
Tobi- Yo, Shiny Head.
Mr. Hans- (uncomfortably) It's actually Mr. Hans...
Tobi- I'm just wondering, why am I getting this food for free? Did I win a contest or something?
Mr. Hans- Huh, you mean you don't know? You stopped that thief from stealing my wallet when you came in here. You ran right through the guy.
Tobi- Really? I don't remember that at all.
Jin- (Notices Tobi's tattoo on his chest) (curiously) That's a cool looking tattoo you've got. What is it?
Tobi- (Pointing at his tattoo) This thing? It's the 'Wolf's Will Adventurer's Mark'. It means I'm a Fighter Class Adventurer.
Jin- (surprised) So you're an Adventurer!? That means you're like super strong right!? I wanna be an Adventurer too, can you show me some moves!?
Tobi- Sure, I'll show you some after I'm done eating if you want.
Kaya- No you won't! I won't let Jin hang around a pervert like you!
Jin- (disappointed) Awe, but I wanna be real strong like him.
Kaya- Besides, if you're really an adventurer then why aren't you off on a job or something?
Tobi- Well, this town doesn't have an Adventurer's Guild and the closest one is in Ox Town. That's where I'm headed.
Mr. Hans- Ox Town? That town is only a few villages over. If you take a train, you could be there in no time.
Jin- Why are you going to Ox Town? Are you going to fight someone?
Tobi- Nah, I'm looking for the Eternity Star. I think the guild there might have some Adventurers who's looking for it too. (The entire diner becomes quiet and everyone stares at Tobi in surprise.) (curious) What? Did I slip out a fart or something?
Kaya- (surprised) E-E-Eternity Star?!?! What do you know about the Eternity Star!?!
Tobi- Only that it's hard to find and grants wishes. Why?
Jin- (angrily) Hey, you can't just steal Kaya's dream like that! She's gonna be the one to find the Eftermity Stah! (Kaya puts her hand over Jin's mouth to get him to be quiet.)
Kaya- (nervously) Hahaha, I don't know what he's talking about. Kids, am I right?
Tobi- Shahahaha!
Kaya- (curious) What's so funny?
Tobi- Nothing, it's just that I'm gonna be the one to find the Eternity Star. I don't care what it takes, even if I might die finding it. I've made a promise to someone that I plan on keeping. So even if I have to travel to Hell and back, I'll be the one who finds it.
Kaya- (angrily) Oh yeah! Well, it's my dream to find the Eternity Star and I'll do whatever it takes too! So I'm gonna be the one who finds it! How about that! (Sticks out tongue.)
Tobi- (angrily) Yeah right! As if I'm gonna let you beat me to it! And just how do you plan to find it, when I've got this! (takes off his necklace and flaunts it in her face.)
Kaya- (angrily) Like I care about some stupid necklace!!
Tobi- Well, this stupid necklace just so happens to be connected to the Eternity Star itself!
Kaya- Seriously?!?!
Jin- That's so cool!
Tobi- Ha, I win. (smiles)

Mr. Hans- Did you just say that  your necklace is connected to the Eternity Star?
Tobi- Yeah. So what?
Kaya- What do you mean, so what?! That means that it's real, doesn't it?!
Tobi- Of course, it's real. Why wouldn't it be?
Kaya- Well, what does it do?!
Tobi- I dunno. Something.
Kaya- You don't know!?
Tobi- I don't know because I can't use it. It needs something called Mana.
Kaya- So you need to be a Mage?
Jin- What's Mana? Is it some kind of food?
Tobi- That's what I thought at first too!
Kaya- You idiots. Mana is the literally the power of one's spirit. Everyone is born with Mana as it lies in the body's Spiritual Pool. But not everyone can use their Mana as their Physical Pool could be larger than their Spiritual Pool. Those that can utilize their Mana to cast magic are called Mages. 
Mr. Hans- Then all he needs is a Mage, right? Problem solved.
Kaya- Not exactly. There are two types of Mages. Ability Mages and Item Mages. Ability Mages can cast magic without the help of an Magical Item. Item Mages are the complete opposite and items are essential for them to cast magic. Since the necklace requires Mana to be used, it can be considered a Magical Item. With that said, only an Item Mage can use it.
Jin- You sure know a lot about magic, huh Kaya?
Kaya- Well, I'd hope so. I am a Mage myself after all.
Tobi- (surprised) You're a Mage!
Kaya- Um... yeah. I try to keep quiet about it though, so can you keep it down?
Man 2- Hahaha! No point in keeping it a secret now!
Man 1- You always were the weird witch like type.
Kaya- (annoyed) What's that supposed to mean!?
Tobi- Wait a minute, if you're a mage... that means you can use the necklace!
Kaya- What!? But I haven't used my Mana in so long.
Tobi- Wouldn't hurt to try. (smiles) Here, put it on. (Hands Kaya the necklace.)
Kaya- (nervous) I-I don't know. What if I can't do it?
Jin- You can do it Kaya! After all, you're the one who's gonna find the Eternity Star!
Mr. Hans- It's now or never, kiddo. (smiles)
Kaya- (sighs) Okay, okay. I'll give it a shot. (Kaya puts on the necklace and begins to forcefully concentrate.)
Tobi- (confused) What's she doing?
Mr. Hans- (unsure) Concentrating?
Tobi- She calls that concentrating?! She looks like she's trying to poop! Shahaha! (Kaya's right eyebrow begins to twitch in frustration.) Now she's twitching! Shahaha! Poop Brow! She's got a poop brow! Shahaha!
Kaya- (angrily & annoyed) Do you want me to do this or not?!
Tobi- You're right, you're right. I'm sorry. (under breath) Poop brow.

(Kaya continues her concentration, but this time looks more relaxed and elegant. The necklace begins to glow brightly.)
Jin- She looks so cool.
Man 1- So that thing actually works.
Man 4- Well I'll be damned. This Eternity Star just might be real.
(The thief that tried to rob Mr. Hans earlier is sitting in a chair and awakens from his slumber.)
Thief- Huh? W-What's going on?
Mr. Hans- So you're finally awake are ya'? You must be pretty weak to get knocked out so easily. We thought you were dead for a second. Hahaha!
Thief- I guess you're gonna turn me into the knights now, huh?
Mr. Hans- Now why would we do that? You were already knocked out and didn't hurt anyone. So there's no need to get the authorities involved in this. Just don't do it again. (smiles)
Thief- I see. Thank you for your kindness. (Looks over at Kaya.)
Kaya- (thinking) It's glowing! I almost can't believe it!
Unknown Voice- North.
Kaya- (surprised) No way!!! (Kaya loses her concentration and falls to the ground in utter shock.)
Tobi- Yo, are you alright?
Jin- Did the necklace hurt you?
Kaya- (Ignoring Tobi and Jin's questions) Did you hear that?!
Tobi- What? I didn't hear a thing.
Jin- Me neither.
Kaya- You're kidding me! It was a voice and it said to go north. You really didn't hear it?
Jin- I didn't hear a thing.
Tobi- North? What is that, some kind of food?
Jin- Actually, I think it might be a drink.
Kaya- You two are hopeless.
Mr. Hans- Hmm, why would it tell you to go north?
Tobi- Maybe that's where the Eternity Star is?
Kaya- No, that's... it! That's it! The voice said to go north and if this necklace is somehow connected to the Eternity Star, then that means that the voice knows where it is! This necklace is like a compass and it's going to lead us right to the Eternity Star!
Jin- No way, that's awesome!
Mr. Hans- That's quite the conclusion, but I guess it makes sense.

Tobi- A compass huh? So that's what it is.
Kaya- (Springs toward Tobi and hugs him) (Happily & Excited) Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
Tobi- (confused) Huh? But I didn't do anything.
Kaya- Okay then, let's get going!
Tobi- Going where? Dammit I'm confused!
Kaya- We're gonna go after the Eternity Star! Now that we have this, we'll definitely find it! (smiles)
Tobi- Since when did I say I wanted to party up!? I work alone!
Kaya- You need me. You can't use the necklace without a Mage, right?
Tobi- Yeah, but...
Kaya- Then it's settled. I'll be your new partner and together we'll find the Eternity Star! You can be my bodyguard.
Tobi- (angrily) Bodyguard?! I'm the leader of this party! After all, I'm taller than you!
Kaya- What does height have to do with any of this?
Tobi- Everything! Huh? Yo, what happened to the necklace?
Kaya- What are you talking about? It's right around my.... What?! No way! It was just around my neck, I swear!
Jin- Maybe you dropped it.
Man 1- Hey, where'd that thief go!?
Kaya- You don't think he took it, do you?
Mr. Hans- It looks that way. To think he was skilled enough to do such a thing, yet he managed to get caught earlier.
(Tobi's face grows serious as he walks towards the exit of the diner.)
Tobi- Shiny Head, have an idea where he could've gone?
Mr. Hans- Not a clue.
Man 5- Looks like he forgot this. (Picks up the thief's bandanna.)
Jin- Let me see that. (Jin grabs the bandanna and begins to sniff it all over.)
Man 5- That's one weird fetish you've got there Jin.
Jin- I've got him! I know where he is!
Tobi- Alright! Good job Jin! You're coming with me! (angrily) Let's go get this bastard! (Tobi grabs Jin and starts carrying him on his back.)
Kaya- Wait, what about me!? (Tobi sprints out of the diner leaving Kaya behind.) Figures.

(The scene is inside of a dark small shack. The thief is standing in front of a tall humanoid creature. The creature has dark green skin, sharp and pointy ears, a buff build, stands about 7 feet tall, and is wearing a sleeveless navy blue vest unbuttoned exposing it's chest, black shorts, and no shoes. It is sitting down on the floor with large bags filled with various items scattered across the shack.)

Creature- It's about time Gato. So what have you got for me today?
Gato- I-It's not much Krog, but here's a crystal necklace.
Krog- Not too bad, what else is there?
Gato- You see, this is all I could get.
Krog- Hahahaha! Do you think that I'm stupid? (Krog stands up and walks over to a pile of bags. He pulls out a large wooden club from one of them and gives Gato a nasty grin; walking closer to him. Krog's chest puffs up and his grin grows more nasty as he closes in.)
Gato- (frightened) O-Of course n-not sir. It's just that I was caught and then this guy came and...
Krog- (angrily) You know I don't like failures and I despise excuses. I gave you a job and expected it to get done. But you failed me and gave me a pathetic excuse. Choose your next words wisely.
Gato- Well, this isn't a normal necklace. It can lead us to the Eternity Star.
Krog- Hahahaha! Do you expect me to believe such a stupid story?! That thing doesn't exist, it's just some stupid myth made up by fools. You humans claim us monsters to be brainless creatures, yet it's the humans who believe in obvious fairy tales!
Gato- B-But it's true, it was glowing and everything! Not only that, it even spoke!
Krog- (sarcastically) Really now? It spoke you say?
Gato- Yes. I didn't actually hear it but this girl in the diner did. And she doesn't seem like the type to lie.
Krog- Fine, I'll humor you. Lead me to this star.
Gato- Well, there's a problem.
Krog- (angrily) What is it?
Gato- It seems to be a magical item and can only be used by a Mage.
Krog- (angrily) Tell me Gato. Are you a Mage?
Gato- N-No sir.
Krog- Am I a Mage?
Gato- No sir.
Krog- Then tell me... (angrily) What the hell am I supposed to do with something that's completely useless to me!?
Gato- I-I have a solution. The girl that used it can definitely do it again. If we just get her, then we can find the star.
Krog- This girl, is she still at the diner?
Gato- I believe so.
Krog- Let's go then. If this star really does exist, then I want to be the one to find it. (nastily grins)

(The scene is focused on Tobi running through the town with Jin on his back. They are still following Gato's scent.)

Tobi- Damn, it's already dark. Just where the hell is this trail leading me?
Jin- (sniffs) We're close! It's that place right there! (Tobi stops at Krog's shack.) The scent goes in there.
Tobi- Alright, I've got the bastard now! (Tobi kicks down the door to the shack.) Give me back my necklace you damn thief!! Huh?
Jin- There's no one here, just a lot of bags full of... treasure!!
Tobi- (surprised) That's a lot of stuff! This must be the thief's stash. He really is pretty skilled.
Jin- (Jin finds and picks up what looks like two large bubble wands; they resemble batons.) Hey Tobi, check it out. These things are Kaya's.
Tobi- What are they? They look stupid.
Jin- I don't know, but let's take it back to her and come back here later. My nose is starting to itch, it smells trouble.

(Back at the diner, The scene is set outside and Mr. Hans is lying beaten and bruised on the ground. Kaya however is unharmed, and standing in front of Krog. Gato is standing behind Krog, watching the entire ordeal.)

Krog- Hahaha! It's just like you humans to pick a fight with someone far more superior than you.
Kaya- (angrily) You're the one picking a fight! This is all your fault!
Krog- (annoyed) Careful human, I don't like being yelled at. Know your place! Monsters will always be on a completely different scale than you inferior humans! Isn't that why you fear us? Hahaha!
Kaya- We don't fear monsters at all! Some of us even like them! It's only monsters like you that we hate!
Krog- Tsk, whatever you say. But this would all just be over if you'd just lead me to the Eternity Star like I said.
Kaya- As if I'd ever join someone like you! I'd rather die!
Krog- (angrily) Then go ahead and die then you damned human!! (Krog swings his club towards Kaya, but she falls down on her butt while trying to step back and he misses, hitting a lamp post. The lamp post is bent after making contact with the club.)
Gato- (nervously) N-Now there's no need to kill them. Can't we just let them go?
Krog- (calmly) You're right, I should just let them go. (Krog begins walking away from Kaya, and towards Gato.) And I'm gonna let you go with them too. (nastily grins)
Gato- W-What?
Krog- (furiously) Go right to hell!!! (Krog then swings his club at Gato hitting him in the chest and sending him flying into a nearby wall.)
Kaya- (angrily) Wasn't he your partner?! Why did you attack him!!?
Krog- I have no sympathy for you humans, especially the weaker ones. Subordinate or not, if they show a sign of weakness, I'll gladly dispose of them. Hahahaha!
Kaya- (thinking) I'm defenseless, if only I had my... (Kaya clenches her fist in frustration.)
Tobi- Give me back my necklace you thief!!!
Kaya- (surprised) Tobi?!
Jin- We're coming Kaya! This guy's gonna get it!
Krog- Tsk, more pests to exterminate.
(Tobi stops running and Jin hops off of Tobi's back.)
Tobi- Jin, stay here. Let me handle this. I'm gonna show you some moves like I said I would. (grins)
Jin- Alright then, give him hell Tobi! (Tobi and Jin fist bump each other.)
Kaya- Thank god you're here, tag in! (Kaya begins running towards Tobi and Jin.)
Krog- (angrily) Where do you think you're going! (Krog runs after Kaya.)
Jin- Kaya, catch! (Jin throws the two bubble wands he found earlier at Kaya and she easily catches them.)
Kaya- (surprised) My Bubble Batons!? (angrily) Did you steal these from my bedroom!?
Jin- We can talk about how I found them later! Right now, focus on kicking some ass!!
Kaya- Right! (Kaya turns to face Krog and holds a Bubble Baton in each hand.) Bubble Bombardment! (Kaya swung her batons in a x form and many bubbles rushed towards Krog.)
Krog-  (surprised) What's this!?
Kaya- Pop! (One by one, the bubbles begin popping with an explosive reaction.)
Krog- (unfazed by Kaya's attack) Hahaha! It's gonna take more than that to stop me! (Krog swings at Kaya, but his club is quickly caught by Tobi's right hand.) What!?
Tobi- Forgot about me? (Tobi easily snaps the club in half with his right hand.) Now, here comes my first move Jin! (Tobi bends down and prepares a punch with his right arm. His entire right arm suddenly morphs into rock.) ROCK DRIVER! (Tobi delivers a powerful punch, sending Krog flying into a building.)
Jin- (shocked) No way! H-His arm!
Kaya- (shocked) What was that!?

Tobi- That's Move 1. (grins) (Tobi's arm returns to normal.)
Krog- (Krog struggles to stand up.) W-What kind of magic is this?
Tobi- Magic? Who's using magic?
Krog- What kind of fool do you take me for?! It's impossible for a human like you to possess such an ability without magic!
Tobi- Who said I was human? Last time I checked, I was 100% monster.
Kaya- (surprised) (thinking) Monster?!
Jin- (thinking) Tobi's a monster!?
Krog- Do you expect me to believe such an obvious lie!? You can't be a monster, you don't even look like one!
Tobi- Looks can be deceiving dumbass. (grins)
Krog- You're one cocky little bastard. Even if you are a monster, what makes you think you can defeat me? I'm a King Goblin, a D-Rank Monster! Even that is enough to send a town of humans fleeing in fear.
Tobi- Maybe, but I'm not human. I'm a Golem.
Kaya- (thinking) Golem? Is that some sort of new species?
Krog- Really, a Golem you say? That's definitely new to me. And just what is your rank?
Tobi- I don't have a rank.
Krog- Hahahaha! A monster with no rank! And you plan on defeating me!!?
Tobi- For someone that hates humans, you really pride yourself on a rank given to you by them huh?
Krog- (furiously) THAT'S ENOUGH OUTTA YOU! (Krog charges at Tobi and sends a punch at him, but Tobi quickly dodges the attack by jumping over it.)
Tobi- Someone's pretty pissed. (Tobi turns his right leg into rock.) ROCK BOOT! (Tobi kicks Krog to his left sending him rolling down the road.) That's Move 2.
Jin- Alright Tobi! I knew you were really strong! Hehehe.
Kaya- (thinking) He's a monster? But he seriously looks just like a human.
Krog- (Krog stands up and is holding the necklace in his hand.) That does it!! Any closer and I'll crush this damn thing!
Kaya- The necklace!!
Jin- What a baby! He talks all big and bad, but he's just a wuss!
(Tobi stopped in his tracks and remains quiet.)
Krog- Hahaha! (Krog puts on the necklace.) As long as I have this, you wouldn't dare touch me!
Tobi- (Tobi's face quickly becomes serious. He then puts his jacket's hood on his head, shadowing his eyes. Tobi clenches his fist in anger.) (angrily) Take it off.
Krog- Now why would I do that? I'm untouchable! Hahahaha!
Tobi- (furiously) She wouldn't want you wearing that! TAKE IT OFF!
Kaya- (thinking) She?
Tobi- (Tobi charges full speed at Krog.) ROCK FORM: GOLEM! (Tobi's right arm quickly morphs into rock and begins to grow larger.)
Jin- Whoa! His arm is growing!
Krog- Wait! I've got the necklace remember?!
Gato- Do you? (A beaten Gato is standing to the far right of Krog, twirling the necklace around in his hand.)
Krog- (angrily) Gato, you snake.
Tobi- ROCK HAMMER!!! (Tobi's fist grew to the point where it was bigger than Krog's body. Tobi punched Krog full force sending him flying down the road and beyond.)
Jin- He sent him flying! That was insane!
Kaya- (thinking) He really is a monster. (looks over at Jin who ran over to Tobi)
Jin- (excited) That was so cool! You were all like "take it off" and he was all like "no wait, don't make me cry", and then you punched him super hard in the face! It was awesome!
Tobi- (Tobi's arm shrank back to normal size and the rock returned to skin as well.) Shahaha! I was pretty awesome, huh?
Kaya- (thinking) But at least he's a good monster. (smiles)

(Mr. Hans suddenly gets up off of the ground. He stands up and puts his hand on his head in a bit of pain.)
Mr. Hans- *grunts* Talk about a headache. Is that guy gone? I had to play dead just so I wouldn't die.
Jin- (happily) Mr. Hans! Are you okay?
Mr. Hans- Haha, I'm fine. This old man isn't hitting heaven's hay anytime soon.
Kaya- Good, because you still haven't renovated that diner. (smiles)
Jin- Hey Kaya, you really stood up to that monster. You were really cool!
Kaya- (happily) Ah, it was nothing. Just me being little ol' me.
Jin- But Tobi was still a lot cooler.
Kaya- (annoyed) You just had to say that. Didn't you?
(Tobi walked over to Gato and places his hand out.)
Tobi- The necklace, hand it over.
Gato- *cough* *cough* So I see you defeated my boss.
Tobi- Yeah, if you're still gonna follow him, I guess I gotta beat you up too.
Gato- I'm done following that monster. But thank you for defeating him. (Gato hands Tobi the necklace.)
Tobi- I didn't do it for you, but whatever. If that guy getting beat up helped you out, then I guess it's alright.
Gato- Yeah, it helped me out a lot.
Tobi- Yo, choose a better boss next time, will ya? Maybe one you can call a friend. That way, you won't need guys like me beating the crap out of them. (Tobi walks away toward Kaya and the others.)
Gato- One I can call a friend?

(The scene focuses on Kaya, Jin, and Mr. Hans waiting at a train station. Mr. Hans is covered in bandages on various parts of his body, but seems to be fine. Kaya is wearing an orange tank top with a star on it, green cargo capri pants, and dark brown boots. She also has a brown satchel strapped diagonally across her chest.)

Kaya- Where is Tobi? He was supposed to be here already. What's taking him so long?
Mr. Hans- Knowing him, he probably overslept.
Kaya- The train will be here anytime now.
Jin- I bet he's been doing some cool training to get even stronger.
Conductor- All aboard!!
Kaya- What?! It's already here! Where is he?!
Tobi- Yo!!!! (Tobi is running towards them with a big bag strapped to his back.) Sorry I'm late, I had some things I needed to get.
Kaya- Some?!! You brought more clothes than I did!
Tobi- Clothes? What are you talking about? My bag is full of those delicious meat pies! Thanks again Shiny Head. (smiles)
Mr. Hans- I did cook you all of those, didn't I? Hahaha, I think my head has been hit so hard, I'm starting to forget things.
Kaya- (angrily) Why would you make him so much food?!
Conductor- Um, excuse me madam. But if you're boarding the train, can you please hurry it up. We're on a tight schedule.
Kaya- Of course, one second please. (turns to Tobi.) Come on or we'll get left behind!
Tobi- I'm coming, I'm coming. But first, there's something I want to give you.
Kaya- Huh? What is it?
Tobi- Here, it's all yours. (Tobi hands Kaya the necklace.)
Kaya- No way! You're giving it to me. But why, what about...?
Tobi- Don't worry about it. I can't use it anyway, and besides she'd want you to have it. (smiles)
Kaya- Okay, I promise to take good care of it. (Kaya then put the necklace on and the two boarded the train.)
Kaya- Bye Mr. Hans! Bye Jin! Thanks for taking care of me for so long! I promise I'll come back to visit when I get the chance!
Mr. Hans- (starts crying) They grow up so fast. (sniff) (sniff)
Jin- Bye Tobi! Later Kaya! When we meet again, I'll be really strong! Just you wait! Hehehe.
Tobi- Shahaha! See you guys!
(The train then departed from the station.)
Mr. Hans- (crying) I'm gonna miss that girl. (sniff) (sniff)
Jin- Stop crying you big butterball.

To Be Continued...

Chapter 2 will be uploaded shortly, but at this moment... I must drain a snake. Also, please post all of your thoughts in the DISCUSSION BOARD

Here's the Wolf's Will Adventurer's Mark for those who wish to see it.
« Last Edit: December 29, 2017, 09:48:02 PM by Synctual »

Put This Here To Make You Sad
My Story
Rock Star! (Shonen)

Offline UnityCentrall

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Re: Rock Star!
« Reply #1 on: August 03, 2016, 10:14:04 AM »
Frucking Awesome!!!
Just reading this gives me the feeling of a classic shonen like One Piece or Fairy Tail! I hope this goes well and I really want to collaborate with you in the future! Also this has made me reconstruct (yes reconstruct) the opening to Destiny Wanderers! Awesome and I can't wait to see what comes next.
"When I die, I don't want you to mourn me. I don't want you to cry for me. I don't even want you to carry on my legacy. All I want you to do...Is to live on" - ???

Offline Synctual

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Re: Rock Star! (Shonen Story)
« Reply #2 on: August 03, 2016, 11:22:46 PM »
Thanks man, I'm glad to see that it gives you that good old shonen feel. That's exactly what I've been wanting to capture for these past 2 years. It's even more awesome that my story can inspire someone. When you type up the first chapter of Destiny Wanderers, I'll gladly read it.

Put This Here To Make You Sad
My Story
Rock Star! (Shonen)

Offline UnityCentrall

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Re: Rock Star! (Shonen Story)
« Reply #3 on: August 04, 2016, 02:22:07 PM »
About Destiny Wanderers, it's getting overhauled for the manga release so when it does come out i'll inform you about it. I've got a patreon page up now, so go and check it out. Anyone who donates gets a copy of it anyway. Right now I'm doing work for the panels so i wont be able to release the story until then, speak to yoou soon and good luck with Rock Star.
"When I die, I don't want you to mourn me. I don't want you to cry for me. I don't even want you to carry on my legacy. All I want you to do...Is to live on" - ???